Trailer Hitch
By Eric Hughes
December 3, 2008
BoxOfficeProphets.com
Timecrimes – Opens December 5th
Marking Spaniard Nacho Vigalondo's first feature-length film, the 88-minute Timecrimes (Los Cronocrímenes when it was released in Spain last year) deals with a innocent little act of time travel, which may have serious repercussions for the involved simple man, Hector.
One day, while sitting on a lawn chair, he spies a woman stripping her clothes off through his binoculars. When he goes to investigate, he's attacked by a mysterious man wearing pink bandages wrapped around his face, leading Hector to seek solace at a nearby laboratory. There Hector hides in a scientific contraption, and moments later he gets out of it, only to learn that it's now hours earlier.
The trailer is a bit chilling, especially once the bandaged guy enters the frame. The sci-fi flick picked up the Bronze Moon of Valencia at the Cinema Jove-Valencia International Film Festival.
Grade: B-
Also expected to be released on this date: The Punisher: War Zone, Cadillac Records, Extreme Movie, Nobel Son, Frost/Nixon, Ciao, Local Color
Delgo – Opens December 12th
This one looks kinda...terrible. Like failure material terrible. Let's just say Delgo marks the first time an animated film has had the pleasure of receiving the lowest grade I'm able to authorize in this space. From Freestyle Releasing, which earlier this year distributed the dreadful (and little seen) Haunting of Molly Hartley and (Uwe Boll alert!!) Postal, comes the animated Delgo, featuring CGI so stiff you'd swear you're merely watching clips of that new pair of tight-fit jeans that you just can't seem to break in.
This one takes place in the obviously fictionalized land of Jhamora, where two kinds of people – the winged Nohrin and terrestrial Lockni – have for the most part learned to coexist. Bad luck strikes, however, when Delgo (Freddie Prinze Jr.), a Lockni teenager, strikes up a friendship with Nohrin princess Kyla (Jennifer Love Hewitt). Hostilities between the two groups quickly escalate.
Grade: F
Also expected to be released on this date: The Day the Earth Stoof Still, Nothing Like the Holiday, The Reader, Doubt, Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi, What Doesn't Kill You, Where God Left His Shoes, The Kings of Appletown
Notorious – Opens January 16, 2009
I'm not too well versed in Notorious B.I.G.'s music catalogue - nor his backstory and subsequent rise to fame. Heck, the "hardest" rap I listen to and enjoy is from Timbaland (and I'd consider his material hip hop before ever calling it rap). Nevertheless, Notorious, opening in mid-January, is one of the first films of the new year that I actually wouldn't mind seeing (alongside comedy Adventureland and maybe Dreamworks' Monsters vs. Aliens).
Starring Brooklynite Jamal Woolard (who raps in real life under the name Gravy) in the title role, Notorious is a biopic of the popular and gifted '90s rapper, Notorious B.I.G., who famously lost his life at the young age of 25 when a still unidentified man fired four bullets into Biggie's chest, ultimately killing the big man about a half hour later. The always excellent Angela Bassett stars here as Biggie's mom, Voletta Wallace.
Grade: B+
Also expected to be released on this date: Paul Blart: Mall Cop, Hotel for Dogs, My Bloody Valentine 3-D
He's Just Not That Into You – Opens February 6, 2009
Originally scheduled for release in October, the $25 million-budgeted He's Just Not Into You boasts the most impressive ensemble cast for a romantic comedy since 2003's Love Actually. Funnily enough, this one, based on a bestselling 2004 self-improvement book of the same name by comedian Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo, actually looks a lot like the American answer to that (mostly) British Christmas classic from writer-director Richard Curtis.
The story chronicles the romantic meanderings between a slew of hot, young people in their 20s and 30s. The common theme that runs through each tale is that one person in each relationship is more interested in jumping the bones of the other person in the relationship, and vice versa. Cast members – warning: this takes awhile – include Drew Barrymore, Jennifer Connelly, Ben Affleck, Jennifer Aniston, Scarlett Johansson, Bradley Cooper, Ginnifer Goodwin, Kevin Connolly and Justin Long.
Though this one will probably do fine as a date movie around Valentine's Day, I still think the comedy's trailer sells it even better as a Christmastime release.
Grade: B+
Also expected to be released on this date: The Pink Panther 2, Dance Flick, Push
The Ugly Truth – Opens April 3, 2009
Katherine Heigl starring in another silly romantic comedy? Why am I not surprised? And this coming from the same woman who boycotted last year's Emmys due to poor storylines on ABC's ultra soapy Grey's Anatomy. Trouble is, this season she's currently sleeping with a dead man, so go figure.
At any rate, here the 30-year-old stars alongside Gerard Butler in The Ugly Truth, a comedy about a morning television show producer (Heigl) who has to try holding down the program fort after a new, chauvinistic correspondent (Butler) is hired. But when the romantically challenged producer falls head over heels for a doctor in town, the correspondent vows to help her blossoming relationship, which leads to an unexpected result.
If a romantic comedy looks decent (like the one before this one), then I'll kindly say so. But sadly The Ugly Truth doesn't appear to be. The jokes are pretty stale – is spilling soda on someone's crotch still funny? And if the trailer gives any indication, I can say with near certainty that Heigl's character ends up with the correspondent in the end. Not the doctor he tried to set her up with.
Grade: D+
Also expected to be released on this date: The Wolf Man