Chapter Two: Clerks II
By Brett Beach
May 12, 2009
BoxOfficeProphets.com

It puts the lotion in the basket or it gets Sideshow Bob to speak again.

The sequel. Along with remakes and adaptations, it has been a cornerstone of the film industry for as long as it took writers and producers and directors to realize that what worked once might work twice, and even if not, audiences might be clamoring for it anyway and be willing to shell out their cash yet again. Very few films that spawn one are content to rest there and thus are franchises born. Chapter Two will look explicitly at the first sequel only.

The sequels that work the best often do one of two things: continue the story of characters we care about in a satisfying way; or take the best elements of the original film and give us another round of those with less fat in between (think of William Goldman's novel The Princess Bride and how it was slyly sold as a fairy tale with all the boring bits cut out). This latter scenario most often applies to action and horror films with bigger ‘splosions, a greater number of gruesome® death scenes or more mind-blowing special effects. Occasionally, sequels opt for the story before the story (i.e The Beginning) and become prequels. Even rarer still are those sequels that appear to disregard entirely what made the first film work and branch off on their own crazed path. Chapter Two will consider them all: the heralded, the unheralded and those that time may have passed by and deserve a second glance. I am always thankful that (so far) James Cameron has resisted any attempts to make Titanic 2. But a part of me wonders as well – Wow, what the hell would that be like? And in that vein of inquiry...welcome to Chapter Two.

Clerks II (2006)

For all the vulgarities, crudities, unconventional sex acts and lewd behavior on display in most of Kevin Smith's movies, they are at heart quite conventional and supremely sincere comedies and he is, to say the least, a tubby, starry-eyed, romantic, sentimental little bitch. It wouldn't surprise me if Smith concurred with this epithet or has used it in reference to himself since self-deprecation is one of his calling cards. Smith acknowledges that he is not that great a filmmaker when it comes to style and technique, which is true, and his willingness to take the air out of himself and his productions makes it that much harder to criticize him harshly. By beating his detractors to the punch, he takes the wind out of their sails (although whoopee cushion might be a more apt analogy).

And yet he is a master of crafting unforgettably profane dialogue exchanges (the competition between Banky and Alyssa in Chasing Amy to recount the most unusual injury received in the line of sexual duty is a personal favorite) and rendering quirky individualistic characters to populate his stories. When Smith is firing on all cylinders, the profanities and jaw-dropping conversations never seem gratuitous. If the words and actions were just shocking, they wouldn't be worth returning to time and again. Trash talking and complete and utter frankness are the way these people relate to one another and if Smith never quite achieves the eloquent gutter poetry of Mamet or Tarantino, his enthusiasm and care for the characters and his cock-eyed optimism are winning.

I approached Clerks II warily (so much so that I finally checked it out just a few weeks ago), and not just because it was a sequel to one of my favorite American films from the ‘90s. I am a big Kevin Smith fan in theory, but only seem to like his films about half of the time. Clerks (in my top 10 of 1994) and Chasing Amy (my favorite film of 1997) are at the pinnacle and to this day, I will defend Joey Lauren Adams' performance and her voice. Jersey Girl (2004) was sweet and enjoyable and yes it was PG-13, but that shouldn't be held against the man. It bothers me that Smith has taken to retroactively talking trash in regards to the film. I feel it's akin to all the apologizing Rivers Cuomo did post-Pinkerton, which still stands as Weezer's best album and possibly always will. I don't mean to suggest that Jersey Girl remains unfairly underrated, just that when artists take to launching insults at their own creations, perhaps it is those objets d'art that are best considered a little more closely.

Dogma (1999) remains severely overrated in my estimation. Smith's attention to Catholic theology is commendable and his effort to wed that to raunchy comedy is worth noting but in the end, it didn't make for a particularly entertaining film or one that I care to revisit too often. Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001) was goofy fun for the most part but at some point wall-to-wall inside jokes end up leaving me cold. And Mallrats (1995) - although this may be heresy to cop to – is one of the few films I can think of where the DVD commentary track is so spectacularly genius and hysterical, it only plays up how lacking the actual production is in guffaws. Smith's attempt to make a lame 1980s teen comedy a decade later was a success, so much so that it's hard to tell one from the other.

What Clerks II demonstrates succinctly is that, at his best, Smith has so much heart and cheer and sunshine entwined with sexual graphicness that there might never be such a thing as over-the-top for him. Two pairs of friendships are at the center of the decade-later follow-up and it's quite telling that those relationships are as memorable as, if not more than, the following: Smith's real-life wife Jennifer Schwalbach flashing her tits; a discussion of if–in the heat of bedroom passion - it is okay for a partner's lips and tongue to move directly from "ass to mouth"; a racial epithet being bandied about in the midst of determining its true derogatoriness; and an honest-to-god donkey show. I had always wondered what that might entail and much like Jay, Silent Bob, Dante and Randal after observing one, I kind of wish I could have kept on wondering.

But back to those relationships. Dante (Brian O'Halloran) and Randal (Jeff Anderson) still work together all these years later, as they did in Clerks, but now it is at Mooby's, a fast food restaurant. (The Kwik Stop from the first film suffers an accidental torching during the opening scene). Dante is mere hours away from leaving not only Randal but blue-collar New Jersey behind forever at the behest of his fiancee Emma (Schwalbach) who intends to set him up in Florida in a house bought by her parents with a job secured by her father. In his passive-aggressive-aggressive way, Randal hopes to keep Dante around, but even he remains unaware for much of the film of the other significant relationship, that of Dante and their manager Becky (Rosario Dawson).

Dawson's fetchingness is at a zenith here and she makes her attraction to schlubby everyman O'Halloran more believable than Katherine Heigl's interaction with Seth Rogen in Knocked Up. This stems in part from an extended scene where Dante is painting Becky's toes in her office and it reminded me of nothing so much as the scene in The Man Who Wasn't There where Billy Bob Thornton is shaving Frances McDormand's legs. It's sexy and charming yet off-handed and the key is that Dante doesn't seem emasculated, like he does with Emma. He seems besotted, as does Becky, although both keep that at bay in an effort to remain just friends.

What warmed my heart the most about Clerks II is how it argues for maturity, even in the midst of ribaldry and juvenilia. The closing scenes between Dante and Randal are wordy and drawn-out even by Smith's standards. But the points they argue for growing up at one's own pace and for one's self and not others, actually lifts the pair above the prototypical Judd Apatow man-child.

And there is plenty more to savor in the film. A soundtrack with unexpected cuts from Talking Heads and Soul Asylum. A giddy out of nowhere production number to the Jackson 5's ABC (which accomplishes the near impossible task of making that track feel fresh). A stunningly goofy and gawkward supporting performance by Trevor Fehrman as Elias, the upbeat though sexually frustrated Christian co-worker of Dante and Randal. (He comes across as unconventionally appealing as Selma Blair was once upon a time). Clerks II doesn't tap the zeitgeist like the first one did, but perhaps that is an unfair thing to expect. By the end, I felt rekindled affection for the old characters and enamored of many of the new ones. And if it might not be akin to the love of heterosexual life partners Jay and Silent Bob for one another or a man for his donkey, well the cockles of my heart were toasty
nonetheless.