TiVoPlex
TiVoPlex
By John Seal
May 25, 2009
BoxOfficeProphets.com
Tuesday 05/26/09
4:00 PM IFC
New World Order (2009 USA): The world of right-wing conspiracy theorist and alternative medicine enthusiast Alex Jones is examined in this non-judgemental but revealing documentary. Jones, who runs the website Prisonplanet.com, believes that 9/11 was an inside job, that the participants in the annual Bilderberg conference are our real masters, and that the gubmint is coming for us so we'd better buy lots of guns and ammo, but New World Order doesn't examine the merits or demerits of each theory, preferring to concentrate on the obsessive behavior of its subject. As director Luke Myer has noted, this isn't a film designed to make people believe one theory or another: it's a film about those who resolutely reside far outside the parameters of the dominant paradigm and, right or wrong, have the courage to tell the world what they think it needs to hear. Also airs 5/30 at 1:00 PM.
7:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
Walk Proud (1979 USA): Here's what I said about Walk Proud last time it showed up TV: Feel free to ignore this recommendation. I repeat: FEEL FREE TO IGNORE THIS RECOMMENDATION. Sorry for shouting. But should you fail to heed my warning...well, gird your loins and prepare for one of the most jaw-droppingly bad motion picture experiences of all time. You see, Walk Proud stars nice Jewish boy Robby Benson - yes, he of Ice Castles and Two of a Kind fame - as a Chicano gang member looking to turn over a new leaf in the barrios of Los Angeles. Now, re-read that last sentence. Robby Benson. Chicano. Gang member. Barrios. And guess what? Robbie not only plays a Latino, he also sings the dreadful theme song, Adios Yesterday! If you haven't choked on your own vomit yet, you of course realize that this surely has to be one of the great casting blunders of cinema history, and as Walk Proud has been absent from the airwaves for what feels like forever, and of course is AWOL on home video, it's an artistic disaster you won't want to miss. Directed by TV specialist Robert Collins and written by Evan Hunter (Ed McBain, fer chrissakes), this astonishing piece of cinema flotsam reportedly set off riots in East LA bijous back in the day. You have carte blanche to smash your TV whilst watching it. All of that remains true, but here's what's new: Walk Proud airs tonight as part of TCM's Latino Images in Film series, so it will no doubt be put in context by co-host Chan Noriega, and it appears for the first time on the small screen in its correct aspect ratio. So don't smash your TV - watch and learn, and then continue to watch (at 9:00 PM) the widescreen television premiere of the similar but superior Boulevard Nights (1979), and (at 11:00 PM) by NYC cop drama Badge 373 (1973), sadly appearing in pan and scan.
Wednesday 05/27/09
1:00 AM Turner Classic Movies
Strangers in the City (1962 USA): I've never seen this very obscure, independently produced drama about the Nuyorican experience, but it sounds fascinating. Filmed on location in New York City, Strangers in the City tells the story of a Puerto Rican family struggling to adjust to their new lives in the slums of Spanish Harlem. IMDb indicates this was shot in 2.35:1, but I'm skeptical, and TCM indicates a full frame print is being utilized. Regardless, this sounds like one you won't want to miss.
2:30 AM HBO
Alive Day Memories: Back from Iraq (2007 USA): Iraq is beginning to recede in the rear-view mirror of history, but the aftermath will be with us for decades to come. This spare but effective HBO original documentary features Iraq War II veterans suffering wounds both mental and physical (and sometimes both), relating their experiences to host James Gandolfini. Gandolfini wisely stays in the background (and is frequently offscreen), keeping the focus where it belongs. With the ongoing escalation in Afghanistan and more wars a-gleaming in the eyes of the Pentagon and the White House, we can be sure this won't be the last film to feature the scarred veterans of unnecessary foreign wars. Also airs at 5:30 AM.
11:30 AM Turner Classic Movies
Call of the Jungle (1944 USA): Yowza! If there's one thing better than a Monogram murder mystery, it's a Monogram murder mystery set in a back-lot jungle! James Bush stars as Jim, the Great White Policeman enforcing the law on the tropical island of Tapu, where the thud-thud of war drums needs to be investigated. Chief Kahuna (Harry Burns) informs Jim that a pair of sacred black pearls have been stolen - and if Jim can't recover them pronto, all the white men and women on Tapu will be killed! It's up to him - and native girl Tana (June Corio), who has a secret crush on Jim - to calm the waters and recover the rocks before an hour elapses and/or the cardboard scenery tips over. This wonderfully outré second feature is followed by three entries in the less entertaining Jungle Jim series, featuring the world's worst actor, Johnny Weissmuller, as the titular explorer: Jungle Jim (1948) at 12:45 PM, Jungle Jim in the Forbidden Land (1952) at 2:00 PM, and Jungle Manhunt (1951) at 3:15 PM.
Thursday 05/28/09
4:00 PM Sundance
Guest of Cindy Sherman (2008 USA): Along with Andy Warhol and Roy Lichtenstein, shutterbug Cindy Sherman is one of the most important "pop artists" of the late 20th century. Her photographs feature the artist herself posing as different personalities or pop culture archetypes. What's perhaps most interesting about Sherman's work is that we instantly recognize the subject matter, whilst we probably wouldn't recognize the artist on the street: her total immersion in these pieces render her invisible in the "real world". This documentary, then, is rather surprising: it deals less with Sherman's style than with her substance, and examines her long-term relationship with cable TV host and erstwhile fellow artist Paul H-O. Co-directed by H-O himself, it's a barbed and amusing look at the absurdities of both the art world and of modern celebrity, and features pithy commentary from the likes of John Waters, Danny DeVito, and Mr. Elton John, David Furnish.
Saturday 05/30/09
6:00 PM Encore Love Stories
True Romance (1993 USA): It's not often that a Quentin Tarantino-penned feature shows up on the Love Stories channel, but I guess when a film is entitled True Romance, mistakes can happen. Christian Slater and Patricia Arquette star as a pair of lovable losers trying to sling some stolen coke on the streets of L.A., whilst big time drug dealer Coccotti (Christopher Walken) pursues them in hopes of reclaiming his purloined property. Like all things Tarantino, the film doesn't know when to stop, but a Grade A cast - including Dennis Hopper, Val Kilmer, Samuel L. Jackson, and Gary Oldman - make it worth a look. It also makes its widescreen television debut this evening.
6:00 PM Starz
WALL-E (2008 USA): Last week, Kung Fu Panda; this week, Pixar's betreaded, binoculared Wall-E. I still love a good kid's movie, and the first 20 minutes of Wall-E are about as good as either a children's film or an animated film get; the balance of the film makes unfortunate but understandable concessions to both genres that lessen the story's overall impact. Also airs at 9:00 PM and throughout the millennium.
7:00 PM Sundance
Lady Chatterly (2006 FRA): What, no lover? This French rendering of D.H. Lawrence's steamy novel, John Thomas (!) and Lady Jane, is widely regarded as the best; as I haven't seen any other versions, I'll defer to the critical consensus. Originally shot for European television, this is the truncated theatrical release trimmed of almost an hour of material, though it still clocks in at a robust 160-plus minutes. Scrumptious Marina Hands takes the lead as Constance, whose husband Sir Clifford (Hippolyte Girardot) is paralyzed from the waist down and therefore isn't up to snuff in the sack. Lusty Constance needs an outlet for her desires, and finds a willing collaborator in the person of game-keeper Parkin (Jean-Louis Coullo'ch). Cue much flower-picking, nude frolicking, and, ahem, dancing around the maypole. I must admit to being underwhelmed by the results, but it's certainly a gorgeous film to look at and it certainly impressed the French, who bestowed a handful of Cesars upon it.
Sunday 05/31/09
5:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
The Winslow Boy (1948 GB): This is the original film version of Terence Rattigan's play of the same name, later turned into a worthy but rather bloodless production by David Mamet in 1999. The story revolves around a teenage boy expelled from school for stealing a postal money order, and the efforts of his family to subsequently clear his name. Neil North portrays accused klepto Ronnie Winslow, whilst Sir Cedric Hardwicke delivers the goods as worn-down Dad Arthur, a Wimbledon gent determined to kick against the pricks of class and authority and prove his son innocent. Based on a true story, the film was directed by Anthony Asquith and also features Robert Donat as the lawyer hired by Arthur to defend his sprog from the long arm of the law. It's followed by another Asquith-helmed feature at 7:00 PM, 1943's The Demi-Paradise, in which Laurence Olivier plays a Soviet engineer working in Britain and coming to terms with its petit bourgeois trappings.
9:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
The White Sister (1923 USA): Lillian Gish and Ronald Colman are the leads in this lush and lengthy silent melodrama from director Henry King. Gish plays heiress Angela Chiaramonte, daughter of an Italian nobleman killed in an equestrian accident. Cheated out her legacy by her rotten half-sister (Gail Kane), Angela decides to join a convent rather than wait for the return of her betrothed, Army officer Severini (Colman). Can life as a bride of Christ offer as much satisfaction as a life of wealth and comfort? The answer, which involves the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius, may surprise you. This big budget independent production was shot on location in Italy, and was a massive box office success in 1923. It makes its TCM premiere tonight.