TiVoPlex
By John Seal
July 8, 2013
BoxOfficeProphets.com
Tuesday 7/9/13
6:30 PM The Movie Channel
Rites of Passage (2012 USA): Everyone needs to earn a living one way or another, which undoubtedly explains why Wes Bentley, Christian Slater, and Stephen Dorff all signed up for Rites of Passage. That’s a pretty impressive trio to headline a low-budget horror flick, but the threesome add sufficient value to make the film worth a gander – suggesting they did, indeed, earn their pay. Dorff plays Nash, an anthro professor whose students are eager to apply their learning by recreating an ancient Chumash ritual, which – side benefit! – requires the ingestion of psychotropic substances. It’s all in the name of research, of course – until one of the student’s brothers (Bentley) decides to participate, loses his ever lovin’ mind, and starts killing people. The uninvited presence of meth maven Delgado (Slater) doesn’t help matters, either, and the body count soon begins to mount. Rites of Passage isn’t particularly gory and admirably attempts something a little different, but despite the best efforts of its Master Thespians is unable to achieve full lift-off. Not terrible, just a bit dull. Also airs at 9:30 PM.
Wednesday 7/10/13
6:45 AM Turner Classic Movies
A Woman of Affairs (1928 USA): As any sentient film fan knows, John Gilbert was one of the biggest movie stars of the 1920s, but fell on hard times when talking pictures came into vogue. The claim that he was done in by a squeaky voice has been disproven ever since TCM started airing his talkies, with the most popular theory now being that Louis B. Mayer strongly disliked Gilbert and stuck him in a bunch of substandard pictures in order to ruin his career. It worked, and Gilbert drank himself to death at the age of 38. Today marks the 116th anniversary of the actor’s birth, and TCM celebrates with a selection of his late period pictures, including A Woman of Affairs, in which Gilbert was cast opposite real-life paramour Greta Garbo in a tale of love amongst the English aristocracy. One of the last silent films to be made in Hollywood (the film was released in December 1928, post-dating The Jazz Singer by 14 months), it’s a lovely to look at MGM production that suffers from an impossibly fruity Bess Meredyth screenplay (which, oddly, earned an Academy Award nomination). It’s followed at 8:30 AM by Desert Nights (1929), Gilbert’s first talkie and the film that marked the beginning of his career’s downward spiral; at 9:45 AM by Redemption (1930), in which he portrays a Russian nobleman in love with a Gypsy girl (Renee Adoree); and at 11:00 AM by Way For a Sailor (1930), in which he plays one of a trio of hard-drinking, hard-living Jack Tars (the others are Wallace Beery and Jim Tully).
Thursday 7/11/13
11:15 AM Encore Family
Going Ape! (1981 USA-GB): Tony Danza stars as Foster, a lucky guy living with a trio of orangutans, in this braindead family movie from Paramount. Foster’s inherited the apes from his late circus-owning dad, but there’s a codicil to the will that provides him with some unwelcome complications: specifically, son must keep the apes healthy and happy for the next five years, or the $5 million dad’s left him will end up in the coffers of the local zoological society. Hilarity ensues as Foster tries to keep the orangutans in line and frustrated girlfriend Cynthia (Halloween III’s Stacey Nelkin) happy. Poorly written and flatly directed by Jeremy Joe Kronsberg (yes, the same guy behind Every Which Way But Loose and Any Which Way You Can), Going Ape! modestly benefits from a enthusiastic Danny DeVito performance as high-wire performer Lazlo.
10:00 PM Showtime 2
Talk Radio (1988 USA): I’m not the world’s biggest Oliver Stone fan – whilst JFK was a great film, it’s a great film on par with such propaganda classics as Triumph of the Will; The Doors was simply embarrassing – but Talk Radio is genuinely good. Eric Bogosian stars in this big screen adaptation of his own play as Barry Champlain, an airwaves gasbag with a lot of chutzpah and a bit of a death wish. A claustrophobic little picture in which most of the "action" takes place within the narrow confines of a broadcasting booth, Talk Radio is an impressive showcase for Bogosian, dubbed Most Promising Actor at the 1988 Chicago Film Critics Association Awards as a result of this performance. Since then, of course, Bogosian hasn’t done a great deal of film work, though his appearance in Jame’s Cox’s Wonderland is quite memorable.
Friday 7/12/13
7:00 PM The Movie Channel
Afterschool (2008 USA): Preppies were all the rage in the 1980s, but by the 21st century they were no better than the rest of us: spoiled, high-strung, and reliant on drugs in order to survive the stress and strain of everyday life, the bloom was most definitely off their rose. Antonio Campos’ Afterschool takes a look at the students attending one highly regarded New England boarding school, and delivers the verdict: preppies are out of their minds. Superbly acted by a no-star cast (including the very fine Ezra Miller) and directed with Kubrickian chill by Campos, Afterschool won the Special Jury Prize for Experimental Narrative at the Nashville Film Festival. Also airs at 10:00 PM.
9:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
Mississippi Mermaid (1969 FRA): Based on Cornel Woolrich’s novel Waltz Into Darkness, Mississippi Mermaid continued Francois Truffaut’s brief late ‘60s flirtation with things noir. Set on the Indian Ocean island of Reunion, the film stars Jean-Paul Belmondo as Louis, a tobacco plantation bigwig taking possession of mail-order bride Julie (Catherine Deneuve). Despite initial suspicions stemming from her lack of photographic similarity to the woman he’s been corresponding with, Louis decides Julie will pass muster as spousal material – at least, until she runs off with all his money. The chase is soon on from Nice to Antibes, with surprising and unexpected plot twists at odds with the source material. This very fine film is followed at 11:00 PM by 1972’s Such a Gorgeous Kid, a lesser known Truffaut which sees the director tackling material based on the writings of hardboiled specialist Henry Farrell.
Saturday 7/13/13
1:40 AM Starz
The Valet (2006 FRA-BEL): It’s not all Truffaut, Grey Poupon, and expensive wine in the world of French cinema - sometimes, the industry churns out stuff like The Valet. This slight farce won’t induce many belly laughs, but it will keep you smiling throughout its 80-minute running time. Gad Elmaleh stars as Francois, a parking attendant who stumbles into a paparrazi photo shoot involving a billionaire and his super-model girfriend. Oligarch Pierre (Daniel Auteuil), immediately aware of the marital peril posed by the snap, hires our hero to pose as the boyfriend of mistress Elena (Alice Taglioni). How long can he maintain the façade? Well, for about 80 minutes.Also airs 4:40 AM.
Monday 7/15/13
8:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
The Last Hunt (1956 USA): Here’s one of the darker American westerns of the 1950s. Directed by Richard Brooks, The Last Hunt stars Robert Taylor and Stewart Granger as business partners tracking and killing herds of buffalo across the open expanses of the Pacific Northwest. Taylor brings brooding menace to the role of Charlie Gilson, a borderline psychopath who, when he isn’t driving species to their extinction, enjoys killing Native Americans and stealing their women. Colleague Sandy McKenzie (Granger) has tired of his chum’s act and is eager to end the bloodshed, but of course there’s one last herd to exterminate before business can be concluded on an amicable basis. Costarring Russ Tamblyn, Debra Paget, and Lloyd Nolan, this is an exceptionally dark western, long unseen in its full widescreen glory but now available to all in 2.35:1 Cinemascope. Even if you’re not a huge western enthusiast, you’re advised to check this one out.