Top Chef California: Episode 11
By Jason Lee
February 15, 2016
BoxOfficeProphets.com

He's probably on about how great his food is and everyone else is an idiot.

Lunch is in the books. Dinner is next up. Which team will prove worthy to take home the Restaurant Week crown?

We pick up where we left off last week, with Palate pleased with their generally error-free lunch service, while District LA has a dozen or so tables left to feed. To say they're in the weeds is an understatement. The weeds have overtaken the garden and are threatening humanity's reign over this world.

As you can imagine, tensions are running high on that side of the kitchen. Jeremy is super pissed, finally realizing his complicity in creating this mess. Phillip is again complaining about the decisions made by Jeremy in the role of executive chef. Amar has turned his attention to what needs to be changed for dinner service.

Once District LA finally wraps things up, Tom and Bill (our guest judge for this episode) calls everyone over. The two teams weren't pushing the envelope, Tom comments. Bill notes that you can't win Top Chef by playing it safe. “Playing it safe gets you sent home,” Tom agrees ominously.

This doesn't bother Palate. Carl, who'll be serving as Executive Chef, knows that their menu is much more complex for dinner. Still, out of an abundance of caution, he starts tweaking the dishes.

There's no time for that at District LA. They're 45 minutes behind due to lunch service, which forces Kwame to enlist a server to start prepping strawberries for Phillip's salad, which is STILL a point of contention between the two chefs. Kwame really wants to start simplifying the ingredients (e.g. mixing the vinaigrette right now to speed up service) while Phillip is still balking. “It's MY dish,” he says with all the petulance of a two-year-old.

He's busy, though, being front of house for his restaurant. Karen's supposed to be in that role over at Palate, but she's much too busy to be taking care of anything related to service. Thus, poor Marjorie must put her dishes on hold and train the wait staff, as she did for lunch. I really hope that doesn't somehow lead to her being sent home.

Back at District LA, Phillip has prepped his man bun for service and is again refusing any tweaks to his strawberry salad. Kwame thinks the onions need salt, but Phillip vetoes that request. You can almost read Phillip's thoughts: “Why can't Kwame see how perfect the dish already is?” Believing that issue to be settled, Phillip starts mixing a complimentary cocktail that his host will be offering to patrons as they arrive. Phillip notes that he's never seen anyone do this before, and believes it's going to be a real point of praise with the judges.

Dinner service starts before we know it. Diners start sitting down at Palate, including the four judges. Karen is quite calm escorting the judges to their table, but back in the kitchen, Marjorie is freaking out because her prep work isn't done yet.

Luckily, she has some parmesan, parsley, garlic bread ready to be brought out to the judges. As usual, Marjorie's baking skills are phenomenal. Tom adores the bread, and Padma appreciates that they have something soft and warm to begin with. Great start for the team.

The appetizers are next. Carl and Karen collaborated on an ox tail consommé with tripe, tortellini, and mushrooms. Padma doesn't like tripe, but surprisingly, really enjoys this version. Tom notes that the tripe is really well cooked, and that the ox tail has a ton of flavor.

Accompanying the consommé is Carl's crudo of snapper, cucumber, ginger, and grapes. Tom comments snarkily about how this is the umpteenth time this season a chef has made a crudo. This prompts Gail to sarcastically imitate the chefs: “I've got it! I'm going to make - wait for it - crudo!” The judges crack up. Thankfully for Carl, they also really enjoy his crudo. Gail loves the heat and Tom likes the brightness of the flavors.

Next up are the entrees. Isaac has a braised lamb shoulder stew with couscous, pickled fennel, and orange. He thinks that it came out exactly as he wanted, and if that's the case, he's right on with the judges. Gail loves it, Tom praises how well cooked it is, and Bill declares it the best meat dish of the day so far.

Next to it is a stuffed trout with coconut rice and heirloom tomato from Karen. This is the first miss of the night for Palate, as Bill and Tom aren't fans, and Gail dislikes the mushy quality of the rice. “This was misconceived from step one,” Bill concludes.

Finally, we have two desserts from Marjorie. She's put together a composed cheese plate with rogue creamery blue cheese, dates, pecans, and plums. With that is a California berry soup with buttermilk panna cotta, vanilla, and macadamia nuts. The judges really enjoy the cheese plate, with the pairing of the dates and blue cheese, but no one likes the panna cotta. Marjorie has put champagne in it (which Karen forgot to mention to the judges when presenting the dish), and the judges find that it imparts an unpleasant selzer water-like flavor.

With that finished, the judges head to District LA. The host informs them that they'll be starting off with a cocktail, but before the judges follow their instincts and head to the bar, he whips out a bottle from behind the host table. The judges are flabbergasted and burst into laughter. When the host brings out cocktail glasses as well, more laughter and sarcasm ensues. Phillip wanders over to see how the judges are enjoying the cocktail but doesn't really understand how absurd the judges find the whole thing.

Sitting down, the judges talk amongst themselves about the menu-namely, the lack of cohesion. “I cannot see a single thread running through this menu,” Gail muses.

Following on the footsteps of Phillip's ridiculous cocktail, Kwame starts off the eating with an amuse bouche of beet-cured hamachi and avocado mousse. “It's horrible,” Bill says succinctly. “Horrible,” Tom agrees, nodding. “This is technique over substance,” Bill follows, “I know how to do foam, therefore I do it.” Gail asks what's in the foam. Padma tells her that it's salt form that resembles “spittle.” Lovely.

Phillip reports back on how badly the dish went over with the judges and Kwame starts to stress out.

The judges, though, are on to the appetizers. They try Amar's avocado gazpacho with king crab salad, lemon pudding, and fried tortilla. While the judges enjoy the flavor, they all agree with Tom's assessment that it really tastes like nachos and guacamole. “Crème nachos,” he calls it.

Next, Phillip's infamous strawberry salad with pickled cucumber, roasted beets, arugula, and strawberry champagne gazpacho finally makes its appearance. It is not a good one. Tom notes that the sauce is so sweet, it resembles a dessert and needs ice cream. Gail calls it “totally underseasoned,” and says that it makes her “sorta angry” because it makes absolutely no sense. “It feels stupid,” she declares. Bill notes that the dish is the result of a novice chef who lacks experience in classical cooking. Tom moves the dish to the far side of the table, out of his line of sight.

Meanwhile, Phillip is off, chatting away with various diners. Tom bets his table that Phillip is talking about his own Los Angeles restaurant, and not the one they're actually in. He's right.

The entrees are next for District LA, with Kwame's roasted amish chicken thigh with cauliflower, and Jeremy's artichoke risotto. Immediately upon looking at it, Bill knows that the risotto has issues. Tom agrees. While risotto should be creamy and spread across a plate, Jeremy's is firm and sits upright. Padma hates the flavor, opining that he cooked it using water and not broth (sacred bleu!).

As for Kwame's chicken, the reaction from the judges is tepid. It's the food equivalent of muzak. Not objectionable, but not memorable. Also, the chicken is overcooked.

The final two dishes come out. First is Amar's braised pork belly with BBQ sauce consommé. Upon tasting it, Gail's face takes on an expression of utter disgust. Seconds later, Padma's does, too. The sauce apparently tastes of pure vinegar. Ew. “It makes my toes curl!” Gail declares.

Next to it is a dry aged rib-eye with celery root purée from Jeremy. Tom declares it “serviceable.” Gail doesn't like how the vegetable accoutrements feel like throwaways.

Soooooo, we have a clear winner in Restaurant Wars. It's Palate, and it's not even close. Tom notes that the hard part of all this is figuring out who's going home. “Whoever goes home,” he notes, “will really deserve it. Sometimes, someone goes home for making good food. Not today. Someone's going home for making really bad food.”

Back in the Stew Room, Amar notes that the Palate team looks nervous. “Maybe we won this thing,” he says.

Nope. That idea is dispelled pretty quickly. “After lunch, the two teams were neck and neck,” Padma tells them at Judges Table. “But after dinner, there's a clear winner, and that winner is Palate.” The four chefs immediately jump for joy. What a relief to have gotten through Restaurant Wars. And with plenty praise to go around. Tom goes on and on - Marjorie did a nice job with front of house during lunch, and took on a lot - from bread to two desserts. Karen did a great job with front of house during diner and made a very successful lunch entrée. The crudo from Carl was great, and Isaac made two fantastic dishes, plus sharply executed service during dinner.

I expect Marjorie to take home her third Elimination Win, but surprisingly, the judges go with Isaac, who (if you'll remember) was the last chef picked for the challenge. Padma tells him that of the food he cooked, the judges could find no fault in either of them. He's absolutely thrilled for himself, and I am, too.

Which brings us to the bad news. To his credit, Jeremy owns up to his errors during lunch service, noting that he didn't help in getting tables cleared. “Lunch wasn't the issue,” Tom says, though. Dinner was where things went downhill. “Like, for example,” he says, “Phillip's cocktail.” Tom recounts how ridiculous it was for the host to reach down from behind the table to pull out a bottle of booze like magic. Bill says that it felt amateurish.

Phillip adopts a smug, snarky grin and says, “Well, thank god I'm not being judged on the cocktail.”

The judges all respond at once, shocked that Phillip would even suggest such a thing.

Gail Why don't you think we aren't judging the cocktail?
Padma: You gave it to us!
Tom: Why don't you think that's fair?

Phillip is taken aback. “Oh,” he says, “well, I'm sorry you didn't like it.”

But that's not all. Bill really didn't like how the front of the house was executed, noting that it felt blunt and forced. Tom points out a few specifics, like how his wine glass was totally filled to the brim, and how servers were very eager to clear plates even though the diners weren't done. “It was a lack of subtly,” Padma says.

The judges start switching targets. Tom hated Kwame's amuse bouche, didn't get much out of it, found no flavor, was overwhelmed by the oil, and simply wasn't amused. Amar's gazpacho wasn't really gazpacho. Gail hated Phillip's strawberry salad, saying she didn't understand it. Tom wants to know if anyone tasted it.

Of course, Kwame did, but Phillip didn't want to heed his advice. Not a problem to Tom - nothing any of the other chefs could have said would have saved the dish.

The guns then get trained on Jeremy. Padma cannot believe Jeremy cooked his risotto using water and not broth. Tom notes that there have been a lot of bad risottos on Top Chef, “but this could go down as one of the worst.”

With so many errors to go around, Padma and Tom can't believe that Amar, as executive chef, didn't step in and play quality control. “I don't care how good a team is,” Tom says, “if it's not being led, this is the result.”

The chefs slouch back to the Stew Room and Amar bids everyone adieu. Isaac asks the bizarre question of whether any of the four chefs on District LA feel safe - unsurprisingly, no one does.

Back at Judges Table. The decision of who to send home has narrowed to Phillip and Amar, with Jeremy and Kwame redeemed by the good dishes they served at lunch. Tom notes that the Executive Chef usually goes home in Restaurant Wars, and Bill agrees that Amar was passive, but the judges aren't sure that Phillip should get away with running front of the house so badly and serving two horrible dishes.

I would love to see Phillip go home. There's only so much pompousness this fan can take.

The judges don't take long to reach their decision. It's Phillip who's packing his knives and going home. YES. Though he maybe should have seen this coming, Phillip claims surprise. “Taste is subjective, I understand,” he tells us, “if you don't like my food, that's fine. But you just told Jeremy that he made one of the worst - if not the worst - risottos in the history of Top Chef, but I go home?” The amount of sheer indignation he packs into that sentence is appalling. “I came into this competition thinking no matter what, I'll cook flawless food. I'm going home cause they didn't like my food, but I know I didn't cook it wrong.”

Even in defeat, Phillip's epistemological blinders are as operational as ever. He just doesn't get it. I can't sum it up better than Gail did on her Top Chef blog:

“What Phillip doesn't understand is there are two different things going on in here: technically, he executed it perfectly; it came out as he intended, the technique was fine. But, here's the thing: it didn't taste good. In fact it was awful. It didn't matter that it was made properly, to his requirements. What really worries me about Phillip is that he definitely has the skill, but he seems to have no insight into his guest's experience and only cares about his own style and preferences. He also seems to have no insight into good or bad food, success or failure, except by his own parameters, which seem to be very narrow. And he's always blaming other people's palates for his mistakes or poor judgment, which is not what being a chef is about.”

Amen.