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Journey to the Center of the Earth 3D – Opens July 11th

I couldn't help but be reminded of one certain, awkward actor after watching Brendan Fraser deliver some of his lines in the new trailer for Journey to the Center of the Earth 3D - Nicolas Cage. Like Cage in his more recent theatrical offerings (think the National Treasure franchise), Fraser's character considers himself brilliant when making a startling "revelation" that nearly any six-year-old could do as well, forcing me to laugh at parts that probably shouldn't be all that funny. When taking a look at the Earth's innards for first time, Fraser announces, "A world...within a world." A little bit later, he tells his traveling partners, "Ladies and gentlemen. I give you...the center of the Earth." But with its dainty PG rating, I'm probably a bit above New Line's target audience. About halfway through the trailer, the film shamelessly plugs itself as the first live action digital 3D movie, which certainly is fitting for a film like Journey. Set in the center of the Earth, where apparently dinosaurs still exist, its mysterious 3D insides should look rather beautiful on the silver screen.

The X-Files: I Want to Believe – Opens July 25th

There hasn't been a theatrical X-Files release in ten years, and the series ended its television run in 2002. So let's just say hardcore X-Files fans are waiting with high expectations to see what creator Chris Carter is releasing this summer. Judging by the premiere trailer, Carter didn't put too much energy into his X-Files update. Though I'm no fan of the series myself, the trailer certainly didn't make me want to add the film's July 25th release date to my calendar. It all begins rather generically, with the typical "there are mysteries that cannot be solved" and "a truth that cannot be ignored" text that is commonly seen in thrillers interwoven between flashes of video. It isn't until a third of the way through that the X-Files theme begins to play, marking the first appearances of special agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully (David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson). But even then, the trailer reverts back to its silly, generic self, with actor Billy Connolly running frantically around for someone – or something – buried just underneath the snow. Sorry, folks. This one looks like a gigantic misfire.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars – Opens August 15th

Just when you think the whole Star Wars "thing" is over, George Lucas has to scrape the bottom of the barrel yet again for an additional source of sci-fi income. No, it's not the rumored live-action trilogy that follows the events of Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi (tear), but rather a CGI-animated film set during the three-year period between Episodes II and III. The film, which is intended to precede the animated TV series slated to air on Cartoon Network later this year, is about the search for Jabba the Hutt's son by two Jedi - Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi. Admittedly, the film looks rather spectacular, especially the animated appearances of such well known, fictional movie stars like Yoda, R2-D2 and C-3PO. Still, I could have done without the title sequence near the end of the trailer, which proclaims Clone Wars offers movie audiences the opportunity to see Star Wars like we never have before. Oh, really?

Vicky Cristina Barcelona – Opens August 29th

In true Woody Allen fashion, not much is known about the acclaimed filmmaker's latest, his fourth in a row to be shot outside the United States and first to be filmed in Spain. And after viewing one of the most bizarrely made trailers I have seen in recent memory, the same holds true. I know nothing more about the film's plot, save for the fact that Javier Bardem, who thankfully got a makeover after looking like death in No Country for Old Men, appears to be a total whore in this one. Featuring no spoken dialogue, and just a Spanish band lightly playing over quick clips of action, the trailer shows Bardem making out with Rebecca Hall, kissing Scarlett Johansson, slobbering over Johansson (again), gently kissing Johansson (again), and returning back to Hall by trailer's end. Oh, and though it's not pictured here, the film reportedly carries a threesome between Bardem, Johansson and Penelope Cruz, which may be the hottest combination of colliding celebrity bodies in the history of American cinema. Ever. The preview ends on the unexpected, as Cruz rounds a corner and shoots at an unknown target. Creepy, Woody, creepy.

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