TiVoPlex
By John Seal
January 7, 2013
3:30 PM Turner Classic Movies
The Face of Fu Manchu (1965 GB-BRD): Christopher Lee delivers the goods as the evil Asian mastermind in this extremely ripe melodrama. Directed with vigor by Don Sharp, The Face of Fu Manchu sees Inspector Nayland Smith (Nigel Green) called in to investigate a series of gruesome stranglings that may be the handiwork of his old nemesis You Know Who. Amongst the stellar supporting cast are Joachim Fuchsberger, Karin Dor, James Robertson Justice, and the unforgettable Tsai Chin as Fu’s wicked sidekick Lin Tang. As an added bonus, this airing marks the film’s widescreen television debut.
Thursday 1/10/13
3:00 AM HBO 2
Jaws 3-D (1983 USA): Told you it was about to get ugly. Here’s sequel number 2, this time shot in crummy 3-D that won’t make you forget Avatar any time soon (though The Hobbit is another matter). Scheider wisely decided to get out whilst the going was still relatively good, ceding responsibility for Amity’s safety to his character’s son, here essayed blandly by Dennis Quaid. Young Brody, however, is not a lawman, but an employee at Sea World, where a Great White is somehow able to infiltrate the premises to threaten cuddly dolphins, penguins, and toddlers. Perhaps it used SNL’s old Candygram disguise to get through the front door.
10:00 AM Encore Action
Cyborg Cop III (1996 USA): And speaking of bad sequels, here’s Cyborg Cop III, which has the honor not only of being a bad sequel, but also being a bad sequel to a bad movie. Also known as Terminal Impact (which title is worse? I’m hard pressed to choose), the plot is the usual old cobblers about super cops designed to survive nuclear war thanks to the introduction of insect DNA into the gene pool. (As we all know, insects are incredibly hardy and long lived.) Cyborg Cop III was shot in South Africa, but you wouldn’t know it, as the film takes place almost entirely indoors.
9:55 PM HBO Signature
Under My Nails (2012 PUR-USA): This Spanish-language drama from Puerto Rico was primarily shot on location during a snowy New York winter and stars newcomer Kisha Burgos as Solimar, a young woman living a hermit-like existence in the Bronx. Orphaned at an early age and raised by her uncle Amalia (Antonio Pantojas), Solimar works at a nail salon, where her only friend is co-worker Rose (Maite Bonilla). The arrival of some new neighbors in the flat next door, however, heralds a change in Solimar’s life, as she’s exposed to their noisy fighting and even noisier sex sessions. The result: a kitchen sink take on the Repulsion meme, with our heroine sinking deeper into loneliness and depression as she develops an unhealthy obsession with all that noise. Burgos - who also wrote the screenplay - is excellent, and though the film’s a slow burner, you’ll be engaged until the end.
Friday 1/11/13
1:25 AM HBO Signature
Extraterrestrial (2011 ESP): HBO Signature is really treating us well this week! I’ve yet to see this Spanish sci-fi comedy, which apparently blends rom-com and alien invasion tropes, but writer-director Nacho Vigalondo’s previous film Timecrimes was excellent. If Extraterrestrial is half as good it’ll still be worth your while.
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