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One might argue that this is the nature of the localized disaster movie as opposed to the global scale, ongoing threat movie that we have explored. But it is not necessarily so. The fires in Inferno rage on and expand, creating an ever growing threat. The disaster, in other words, is ongoing until it’s not: at the very end. Earthquake, by contrast, delivers its disaster goodness in one fell swoop and then focuses essentially on characters trying to escape from the devastation. It is an amusing, even suspenseful and harrowing story at times, but really only a poor excuse for a disaster movie.

And when it does show destruction, it is relatively minimal and tame compared to what they could have done with L.A. and some of its landmarks. Again I return to 2012 and even the Day After Tomorrow, both of which in short sequences accomplished ten times the devastation that Earthquake did in its entire film.

At least the plot is strong enough to make it worthy of consideration for a remake - but by a much more daring and blood thirsty director.

1. The Core

I’ll right to the chase - this movie wins because of how disappointed I was when I saw it. Call me crazy, but I was excited to see The Core. The premise was delicious: the Earth’s core stops spinning, and all sorts of catastrophes ensue. Not just earthquakes and floods, but electrical storms, attacking animals (a refresher from escaping animals), and deadly ozone layer holes. The gamut of destruction was endless.

And the movie also starred a respectable cast that included Stanley Tucci, Aaron Eckhart and two-time Oscar winner Hilary Swank. But, oh, what a gigantic and disastrous disappointment this movie proved to be. Simply terrible.

Here are some of the plot points: a machine is constructed within weeks that can drill into the center of Earth, some 1,000,000 times deeper than we had ever been. This machine can chain start the Earth’s core with a nuclear reaction that has to be precise to the millimeter. And, better yet, there is a plan for these unlikely heroes - an eclectic mix of astronauts, computer geeks, and scientists (Armageddon anyone?) - to get back safely. And, that they do. Somehow.

All right, you may say, you have forgiven the horrible science of movies like the Day After Tomorrow and the improbable rescue sequences of movies like Deep Impact. Why not permit The Core the same indulgence? Quite simply, because the sucking of The Core goes miles beyond that. The destruction sequences are treated as an afterthought, not as, no pun, the core of the movie - as they should be in a good disaster movie.

And it’s not that there is a hokey love story to steal the attention (I mean there is one but that too is an afterthought), it’s that the movie can’t make up its mind what it’s about. Is it about the love story? The intrigue behind the scenes of the alternate plans to save the universe? The destruction? You don’t know, and after having watched the movie repeatedly (I know) I still can’t figure it out.

My level of disappointment compared to the promise and expectation from this movie (perhaps my own fault) makes it my least favorite disaster movie of all time.

Not that I won’t watch it, but still…

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