|
2014 Oscar BlogMarch 2, 2014
Hello, everyone, and welcome to BOP's 13th annual Academy Awards live blog! As is ordinarily the case here, we will officially start blogging when the actual show begins. We will also offer a few quips here and there during the pre-show fashion celebration, especially if Bjork attends. - David Mumpower, 2:39 pm
It's currently just after 6:25pm on the East coast. The official start time for the Oscars is 8:30pm on ABC. ABC will begin airing their official Red Carpet arrivals and interviews at 7pm. Other channels currently showing red carpet arrivals are the CW network, CNN, and E, all currently live. - Max Braden, 6:26 pm Sidney Poitier's red carpet interview is exactly why he has the nickname of "Mr. Electric". I half expected him to start talking about going to Shelbyville with an onion on his belt, which was the style at the time. - Reagen Sulewski, 7:05 pm It's just at this moment that the producers are second guessing their decision to front load with a bunch of older nominees in an area with tons of background noise. "I SAID... WHO ARE YOU WEARING!!!" - Reagen Sulewski, 7:09 pm "Hey Sally Hawkins, you're not making any sense. Time for someone more famous." - Reagen Sulewski, 7:16 pm Thank you Jason Sudekis and Olivia Wilde for updating us on your sex life. Although in Jason's defense, I'd be shouting that from the rooftops. - Reagen Sulewski, 7:19 pm Even with the baby on the way I could envision Olivia Wilde dancing on a table at an after party tonight. - Max Braden, 7:21 pm Speaking of Kerry Washington, what can it possibly mean that there's some "shocking things coming up" on Scandal? Where can that show go? An alien invasion would be a step backwards at this point. - Reagen Sulewski, 7:22 pm Every year, I'm impressed with the work that Walt Disney has done on the animatronic Tyson Beckford. You can barely see the seams. - Reagen Sulewski, 7:24 pm "Never be another first time"? I thought time was a flat circle, Matthew! - Reagen Sulewski, 7:26 pm Matthew McConaughey seems to be wearing a black tux jacket wrapped in a white tux jacket. "Who are you wearing?" "Taco Bell." - Max Braden, 7:27 pm And don't worry, Megyn Kelly, Jared Leto is wearing a white men's outfit. - Max Braden, 7:28 pm Jennifer Lawrence being interviewed! Prepare the hashtags! - Max Braden, 7:31 pm What a robust segment that was. Matthew McConaughey and Whoopi Goldberg: it's like the cast of a bad 90's sports movie. - Reagen Sulewski, 7:34 pm I'm disappointed that Blanchett didn't commit and conduct that interview as if she was talking to herself. - Edwin Davies, 7:35 pm Damn, I was hoping that Jonah and Leo were working together on the long-awaited sequel to Accepted. - Edwin Davies, 7:36 pm Edwin, except now when Jonah gets people to ask him about his weiner, it's of his own volition. - Reagen Sulewski, 7:39 pm If The Wolf of Wall Street wins anything tonight, I hope that their after party will consist solely of tea and crumpets. - Edwin Davies, 7:41 pm Somewhere, animated .gif creators ready themselves for every shot of Jennifer Lawrence. - Tim Briody, 7:42 pm To finish this interview, Chiwetel Ejiofor runs a sword through the interviewer, then marries Keira Knightley. - Edwin Davies, 7:43 pm "Leo, which supermodel are you wearing tonight?" - Max Braden, 7:43 pm How paranoid do you think Chiwetel is about his drinks now? - Reagen Sulewski, 7:44 pm Leo just referred to The Wolf of Wall Street as a novel. Either he misspoke, or later tonight we're going to hear him say, "Wait, all of that stuff really happened?!" - Edwin Davies, 7:46 pm I'm not sure which is crazier; that Jamie Foxx is 46 and has a 20-year-old daughter, or that he won an Oscar once upon a time. - Edwin Davies, 7:52 pm I have it on good authority that Jared Leto smells like wet dog. - Reagen Sulewski, 7:54 pm Every time I see Jared Leto I like to imagine which 70s rock band he'd be in. Today I'm thinking The Allman Brothers. - Max Braden, 7:56 pm Jared Leto is going to be so upset when someone tells him that they already made Son of God and he didn't get the gig. - Edwin Davies, 7:57 pm Does Channing Tatum know that Jonah is cheating on him with Bradley Cooper? - Reagen Sulewski, 8:00 pm I am very confused as all the men with beards look vaguely like Michael Sheen this year - Brett Beach, 8:01 pm Jonah Hill: Bradley, imma let you finish, but I gave one of the best performances of all time. Of all time! - Edwin Davies, 8:01 pm Tyson just had the most obvious cleavage stare in the history of the Oscars. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:02 pm Where is Tom Hanks to hijack Barkhad's interview? - Max Braden, 8:03 pm Times have changed. Fifteen or twenty years ago this Oscar ceremony would be all about August: Osage County because of Roberts and Streep. They're there, but almost an afterthought. - Max Braden, 8:05 pm It's amazing how far Julia Roberts has gone in Hollywood despite not knowing how microphones work. - Edwin Davies, 8:05 pm I'm glad that Jimmy Kimmel is here to finally remind us how much we suck and how we'll never be good enough. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:07 pm I always knew that Jimmy Kimmel was that girl from The Ring. - Edwin Davies, 8:08 pm Quick! Let's see if we can say something vicious and get a shoutout from Kimmel! - Max Braden, 8:08 pm That Neal McDonough Cadillac ad is scarier than his whole run on Justified. - Edwin Davies, 8:11 pm Fun fact: Will Smith is now older than Uncle Phil was at the start of Fresh Prince. In other news, you are old. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:14 pm "This year, Oscar nominated films took us places we've never been to." It's true! I have never been to Nebraska. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:15 pm "Jeremy Renner, it must feel great to have a larger supporting role as you do in American Hustle, coming after The Avengers." - Max Braden, 8:16 pm Will Smith saying that he knows the cameraman from Fresh Prince either demonstrates what a cool guy he is, or how much effort he has put in to stalling that guy's career. - Edwin Davies, 8:17 pm I'm glad that Sandra Bullock's botox has finally worn off. She was starting to look about as realistic as a DreamWorks Animation character. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:21 pm Kevin Spacey in his blue tux looks perfectly set up to do a song and dance, too bad he probably won't. And I hope Ellen doesn't; I get enough of that on SNL. - Max Braden, 8:25 pm Hey, Kevin Spacey, I know you from the Internet! - Reagen Sulewski, 8:25 pm We are one commercial break away from the start of the 2014 Academy Awards. From this point forward, all of the posts count! - David Mumpower, 8:26 pm Hello everyone. Am I the only one hoping for a huge surprise in a major category? - J. Don Birnam, 8:28 pm I hope Ellen starts with a song and dance number called "We Saw Your Dick," then struggles to name actors after Michael Fassbender. - Edwin Davies, 8:28 pm Some Children of the Oscar Corn set design going on in the background. - Max Braden, 8:30 pm I'll say what we're all thinking: June Squibb looks HOT! - David Mumpower, 8:32 pm It's so great that after seven years and everyone else saying no that Ellen got to come back. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:32 pm The real Captain Phillips and the real Philomena in one place. Crossover! - Edwin Davies, 8:33 pm Ellen DeGeneres is doing her usual brand of too clever comedy. The crowd's confusion is palpable. - David Mumpower, 8:35 pm Nicholas Hoult is just happy to be there. And that no one is mentioning Jack the Giant Slayer. - Edwin Davies, 8:38 pm Bruce Dern is too old for your jokes. - Max Braden, 8:38 pm Right now, you hear the sound of a thousand angry Buzzfeed articles being written about Anne Hathaway. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:40 pm Ellen: "Anything can happen, so many possibilities. Possibility number one: 12 Years a Slave wins Best Picture... possibility two: You're all racist..." got a hearty laugh. - Max Braden, 8:41 pm I guess they are starting with a more locked category (Supporting Actor) to leave Supporting Actress (more exciting) for later? - J. Don Birnam, 8:41 pm I thought the ceremony always started with Supporting Actor... - Kelly Metz, 8:42 pm The Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor goes to Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club. - Kim Hollis, 8:42 pm I reckon this one's getting played off. - Edwin Davies, 8:44 pm They alternate between starting with Supporting Actor and Supporting Actress. In related news, that wasn't a particularly subtle group of nominated performances, was it? - Reagen Sulewski, 8:45 pm Leto, the artist formerly known as Jordan Catalano, does something classy by shaking Jonah Hill's hand before walking up to accept his award. Claire Danes, the star of My So-Called Life, has won four (!) Golden Globes but has no Academy Awards nominations to date. - David Mumpower, 8:45 pm Jordan Catalano's brother looks like David Silver. - Kelly Metz, 8:46 pm Some years they start with Supporting Actress, I think? - J. Don Birnam, 8:46 pm And it only took one acceptance speech to awkwardly throw an unrelated reference to Ukraine in there. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:47 pm For those of you under 30, let me offer a less dated reference: The guy from 30 Seconds to Mars just won an Oscar. - Tim Briody, 8:47 pm (I did not realize that - thanks!) - Kelly Metz, 8:47 pm And they're pandering to the Kim Hollis crowd with a full segment on animation. - Kim Hollis, 8:49 pm And continuing Tim's idea, Jim Carrey starred in a few comedies in the 1990s. None of them stood the test of time so it's okay that you Millennials don't know them. - David Mumpower, 8:49 pm You couldn't throw one Miyazaki film in there? Not even during the flying sequence? - Edwin Davies, 8:50 pm Pharrell is really campaigning hard for the Ranger Smith role in the reboot of Yogi Bear - Edwin Davies, 8:52 pm Jennifer Lawrence to Pharrell: "Please don't ask me to get up and dance. I'll fall." - Kim Hollis, 8:52 pm THIS IS WHY YOU LET THEM PERFORM THE SONGS, ACADEMY. IT'S FUN! - Edwin Davies, 8:54 pm Aww, I was hoping for him to take off his hat to reveal a minion hiding underneath. "TADAAAAA!" - Kelly Metz, 8:54 pm Pharrell Williams performs Happy, the dark horse candidate for Best Song as 100 dancers hop around in the background. A bunch of them are kids who are having the time of their lives. Pharrell also seduced Meryl Streep into shaking her moneymaker. Since I have (unfortunately) seen August: Osage County, that cleavage-shaking dance becomes my favorite performance of hers over the past year. - David Mumpower, 8:55 pm I think the hat was just a distraction for the fact that he was stealing Judy Garland's ruby slippers from The Wizard of Oz. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:55 pm Edwin: I agree. I love seeing the songs being performed. - J. Don Birnam, 8:56 pm If I were the showrunner I'd just go ahead and use Happy as the closeout song at the end of the broadcast too. - Max Braden, 8:56 pm Sam Rubin is all "Why is Laurence Fishburne up there?" - Reagen Sulewski, 8:57 pm I'm just happy they're going with Idina Menzel singing "Let It Go" as opposed to the inferior version. - Kelly Metz, 8:57 pm Who built a better, less deserved career through a lesbian kiss, current presenter Naomi Watts or Katy Perry? - David Mumpower, 8:58 pm The Academy Award for Best Costume Design goes to The Great Gatsby. - Kim Hollis, 8:58 pm I think we should take that performance aspect out to all the categories. Make the costume people sew a dress on stage. - Reagen Sulewski, 8:58 pm By the way, Happy is the #1 song in the US right now. If it wins Best Song, it would be the first time that's ever happened. A song that's gone to #1 has previously won the Academy Award, but not while it was #1. (Eminem's Lose Yourself.) - Tim Briody, 8:59 pm Interesting. The Costume Designers Guild gives three awards each year - for Contemporary Film, Period Film, and Fantasy Film, and Gatsby lost out to 12 Years a Slave in the CDG's Period Film category. - Max Braden, 8:59 pm Best Make-Up: Bad Grandpa anyone? - J. Don Birnam, 9:00 pm The Academy Award for Makeup and Hairstyling goes to Dallas Buyers Club. - Kim Hollis, 9:00 pm Max: Another fan fact about that award. Catherine Martin won Best Costumes and Design for another movie her husband directed--Moulin Rouge. - J. Don Birnam, 9:01 pm Oh, excellent. I wasn't ready to live in a world where The Lone Ranger was an Academy Award winner. - Kelly Metz, 9:01 pm Jennifer Lawrence right now is thinking, "Wait, you can get escorted up? Dammit!" - Reagen Sulewski, 9:01 pm Revealing that the make-up budget was only $250 on Dallas Buyers Club was a campaigning masterstroke. - Edwin Davies, 9:02 pm I'm pretty sure the Academy was just afraid of what the Jackass people might have done. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:02 pm Somewhere, Johnny Knoxville sighs and changes the channel, wondering what he has to do to win the hearts of the Academy. - Tim Briody, 9:03 pm Here to present an award: the thousand year old knight from Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade. No wait, that's Indiana Jones. - David Mumpower, 9:03 pm There are actually hair professionals in this business, Harrison, avail yourself of them! - Max Braden, 9:04 pm Though I'd prefer it if they disposed of these pitches for the nominees, I'm glad that they are at least bunching them up this year. - Edwin Davies, 9:04 pm I suspect what hurt Johnny Knoxville in the vote is that he was such a bad grandpa. - David Mumpower, 9:04 pm I'm shocked there were 45 seconds of profanity-free clips to throw together for Wolf of Wall Street. - Kelly Metz, 9:05 pm Too bad those make-up ladies only had a $10 budget for their own make-up - J. Don Birnam, 9:06 pm And the nominees for Most Stiff or Nervous Onstage Presence, are: Channing Tatum, Matt Damon, Sally Hawkins... - Max Braden, 9:07 pm I wonder how many of those kids were happier about being 50 feet away from Channing Tatum than they were about being chosen for "Team Oscar". - Kelly Metz, 9:07 pm The terrible secret is that they sacrifice the members of Team Oscar to the shade of Louis B. Mayer after the show - Edwin Davies, 9:08 pm Kim Novak and Matthew McConaughey? Are they drawing these pairings out of a hat? - Reagen Sulewski, 9:11 pm Kim Novak just turned 81 two weeks ago. - Max Braden, 9:11 pm Ellen DeGeneres is delivering lottery tickets as consolation prizes to category losers. If this had been a policy for the past thirty years, Martin Scorsese would have won the lottery by now. - David Mumpower, 9:12 pm Oh, Kim. It's okay for an 81-year old to *look* 81. - Kelly Metz, 9:12 pm The Academy Award for Best Animated Short Feature goes to Mr. Hublot. - Kim Hollis, 9:12 pm Kim Novak's face does not look like it all comes from the same person. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:13 pm Get a Horse! was the only Animated Short I saw, because it played in theaters (in front of Frozen, if I recall correctly). It was a bunch of fun. - Max Braden, 9:13 pm Ah...everyone thought that opening up the voting to the whole Academy would alter the results in favor of the more known name in the race (Get a Horse!) but I guess it did not. Mr. Hublot is the deserving winner for Best Animated Short. - J. Don Birnam, 9:15 pm Kim Novak provides a horrible reminder that Hollywood treats actresses past a certain age so badly that they do that to their faces. - Edwin Davies, 9:15 pm The Academy Award for Best Animated Feature goes to Frozen. - Kim Hollis, 9:15 pm Has your movie earned a billion dollars worldwide? No? Then, you don't win the award for Best Animated Feature. - David Mumpower, 9:15 pm I can't believe Kim Novak's upper lip just won Best Animated Feature! - Les Winan, 9:15 pm Sally Field hasn't changed in 30 years. NSA, why aren't you investigating the real mysteries of our era? - David Mumpower, 9:17 pm Sally Field and Pharrell Williams are drinking from the same water supply. - Kelly Metz, 9:18 pm I feel sorry for Ed Harris. He got them through Apollo 13, but really screwed up with Gravity. - Edwin Davies, 9:20 pm I just tuned in...how many montages so far? - Les Winan, 9:20 pm Unless I missed something, I don't think Atticus Finch should have been in that segment. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:21 pm Best Visual Effects is coming up. I had trouble deciding what would win this. - J. Don Birnam, 9:21 pm The Academy Award for Visual Effects goes to Gravity. - Kim Hollis, 9:21 pm Emma Watson just entered, walking arm in arm with Joseph Gordon-Levitt. If she is touching any part of his arm, she must not have watched Don Jon. - David Mumpower, 9:21 pm Les, there's always the upcoming tribute to montages to look forward to. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:22 pm We haven't seen Pink yet. I'm hoping she's poised in the rafters waiting to swing down and snatch any Oscar winner that upsets Gravity. - Max Braden, 9:23 pm Tomorrow, J.K. Rowling will say, "You know, I really shouldn't have paired Emma Watson and Joseph Gordon-Levitt at the Oscars." - Edwin Davies, 9:25 pm These song performances would have been really awkward if they'd left that one song from the racist movie in. "Wait, we voted for *that*?" - Reagen Sulewski, 9:25 pm Anyone know which world music Ezra Koenig appropriated for this gentle guitar strumming? - Les Winan, 9:25 pm That performance of the song from Her is very reminiscent of the Hansard-Irglová duet the year "Falling Slowly" from Once was nominated. - Max Braden, 9:26 pm Ellen just became the first person in history to have trouble pronouncing Jason Sudeikis' first name. - Edwin Davies, 9:30 pm I see Jason Sudeikis is wearing his "I impregnated Olivia Wilde" shoes. - Les Winan, 9:30 pm I think Kate Hudson gets my early vote for best hair, makeup, and costume design tonight. - Max Braden, 9:30 pm Right now, Kate Hudson is wondering how Jennifer Lawrence stole her career. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:31 pm The Academy Award for Best Live Action Short goes to Helium. - Kim Hollis, 9:31 pm Woo-hoo! I randomly guessed Helium correctly on my ballot! - Max Braden, 9:31 pm The 20% of people who guessed right are now boring their friends with a detailed explanation of the logic they employed to predict Best Live Action Short. - David Mumpower, 9:32 pm Fun fact: Jason Sudeikis is George Wendt's nephew. Look closely and you can see the resemblance. Once I noticed it, I can never not see it now. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:32 pm David: Yeah. That and that category may well determine who gets ahead in the pool! - J. Don Birnam, 9:33 pm The Academy Award for Best Documentary Short Subject goes to The Lady in Number 6: Music Saved My Life. - Kim Hollis, 9:33 pm Never bet against the Holocaust! - Reagen Sulewski, 9:33 pm Once...just once, could someone at the Oscars win for something related to the Holocaust? - Les Winan, 9:34 pm My husband, while watching the nominees list: "Oh, a Holocaust film? Yeah, that's my pick." - Kelly Metz, 9:36 pm Harrison Ford wants pizza because he's baked out of his mind. - Les Winan, 9:36 pm Apparently the producers told Ellen the show was running short. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:37 pm Ellen DeGeneres just asked a pregnant woman if she wanted pizza. That's like asking a man if he surfs porn. - David Mumpower, 9:37 pm Cue Steve Martin running down the aisle with some dip for Jack Nicholson's carrots. - Max Braden, 9:37 pm Rocket Raccoon (aka Bradley Cooper)... Academy Award presenter. - Les Winan, 9:37 pm The Academy Award for Best Documentary Feature goes to 20 Feet from Stardom. - Kim Hollis, 9:37 pm Just remember, nobody will be as pleased with Ellen Degeneres' hosting tonight as Ellen Degeneres. - Les Winan, 9:38 pm Voters may have been too scared to watch The Act of Killing. I don't entirely blame them, but it's still a documentary everyone should see. - Max Braden, 9:38 pm Darlene Love looked like she was debating cupping the right breast of the woman in the silver dress. - Les Winan, 9:39 pm Was that considered a surprise win? - Kelly Metz, 9:40 pm There's always one guy that's the last person in the standing ovation. "All right, I guess we're doing this." - Reagen Sulewski, 9:40 pm Darlene Love just sang her gratitude. If the music had tried to play her off, how would that have worked? - David Mumpower, 9:40 pm And of course the documentary that wins is the one I haven't seen. - Edwin Davies, 9:40 pm Kevin Spacey looks like he's trying to find someone to murder. - Les Winan, 9:41 pm The Academy just admitted that they all binge-watched House of Cards instead of watching most of the nominees. - Edwin Davies, 9:41 pm AKA the "Yeah, we've given up on you getting a regular Oscar" award. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:43 pm Jennifer Lawrence hasn't caught up yet, so don't spoil her. - Max Braden, 9:43 pm "I'm doing SUCH a wonderful job!" - Ellen Degeneres, backstage right now...I'm assuming. - Les Winan, 9:43 pm Google Play ad appreciating movies: "And what about Danny Trejo, has that guy ever turned down a part?" "No." - Max Braden, 9:46 pm Kelly: Not really, I don't think. It was either that or Act of Killing and the one in this category of late has been the more uplifting fare. - J. Don Birnam, 9:47 pm Best Foreign Language Film: I am hoping Broken Circle Breakdown wins, but I picked the Italian Movie. - J. Don Birnam, 9:49 pm I think Ewan McGregor has grown a beard so people will cast him, mistakenly believing him to be Michael Fassbender. - Edwin Davies, 9:49 pm Ewan McGregor's giant smile as he came out on stage was because he was thinking "You've all seen my penis." - Les Winan, 9:49 pm The Academy Award for Best Foreign Language Film goes to The Great Beauty. - Kim Hollis, 9:49 pm Don: Thanks. It was the only one of the documentary nominees I saw this year, and I liked it enough, but I was surprised it won. I thought The Act of Killing would be the favorite, based on what I'd heard of it. - Kelly Metz, 9:49 pm Ewan McGregor is styling with his latest look, Hobo Chic. - David Mumpower, 9:50 pm We know Jared Leto. We've seen Jared Leto's hair and beard. You, Ewan Macgregor, are no Jared Leto. - Max Braden, 9:50 pm You'd think the winner of the Best Foreign Language Film Academy Award would have the courtesy to speak English. - Les Winan, 9:51 pm Tyler Perry doesn't understand why Jared Leto gets an Oscar but not him. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:51 pm Hmm, Tyler Perry should make all the Best Dressed lists tomorrow. That diamond clip on his tuxedo is sublime. - David Mumpower, 9:52 pm "What's the exact opposite of all of my films?" - Tyler Perry, negotiating what movies to introduce - Les Winan, 9:52 pm Meanwhile, Amy Adams just hit a new high score on Flappy Bird. - Reagen Sulewski, 9:52 pm They are showing clips from Best Picture nominees Her and Gravity. I am now wondering if the Samantha OS is the cause of the space shuttle meltdown. - David Mumpower, 9:54 pm Very pleased that The Great Beauty won, though I'd have been equally pleased with anything that wasn't Broken Circle Breakdown. - Edwin Davies, 9:54 pm The best part of being an Academy voter tonight is that you get a free U2 concert. - David Mumpower, 9:55 pm Bono's hair is communicating silently with John Travolta's hair. - Les Winan, 9:56 pm Stand back as the ladies throw their Oscar statuettes on stage for Bono. - Max Braden, 9:57 pm This should really be called "Ordinary Song." - Edwin Davies, 9:57 pm I really hope they turn this into a medley that includes "Get On Your Boots" and "Discotheque". - Les Winan, 9:58 pm McConaughey really approves of Mandela. Good to know. - Edwin Davies, 9:58 pm "Jared Leto, get up here for an impromptu jam session!" - Max Braden, 9:58 pm Ed: Care to expand? I liked that movie! - J. Don Birnam, 10:00 pm Next time I have to do a presentation that's going badly, I'm going to project a picture of Mandela behind me. Guaranteed ovation. - Edwin Davies, 10:01 pm Liza Minelli has no idea what planet she's on. - Les Winan, 10:02 pm J. Don: I really liked the first half, but found the second half horribly sloppy, manipulative and unsubtle. Soured me on the whole thing. - Edwin Davies, 10:02 pm Cast members of Friday Night Lights and Veronica Mars are now presenters at the Oscars. BOP's entire existence is now justified. - David Mumpower, 10:05 pm It's nice Kristen Bell covered up her giant upper chest tattoo of the Veronica Mars Kickstarter URL. - Les Winan, 10:05 pm I should say something about the Veronica Mars kickstarter but instead I'm going to note that Kristen Bell is looking pretty busty. - Max Braden, 10:05 pm I like that Chris Hemsworth always seems to be well aware of how ridiculous the world around him is. - Les Winan, 10:06 pm Charlize looks annoyed to be there. She was promised a major category, not this technical crap. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:07 pm Charlize Theron and Chris Hemsworth are now presenting. 30% of couples will miss the next half hour of the show. - David Mumpower, 10:07 pm The Academy Award for Sound Mixing goes to Gravity. - Kim Hollis, 10:07 pm Half hour...ha ha ha. The other 70% of us can go longer than that, David. - Les Winan, 10:08 pm Lurch looks like he could have just reached up and plucked Sandra Bullock from orbit. - Max Braden, 10:09 pm Sure but you'll miss the major awards that way, Les. - David Mumpower, 10:09 pm The Academy Award for Best Sound Editing goes to Gravity. - Kim Hollis, 10:09 pm Gravity is up to 3 Oscars. If this continues, we could see a repeat of Godfather/Cabaret--and Liza Minelli is in the house! - J. Don Birnam, 10:10 pm If you had "Sandra Bullock smiling and clapping" in your Oscar drinking game, you are in a coma now. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:10 pm With a pair of wins in the last two minutes, Gravity has surpassed Dallas Buyers Club to become the leader with most statues so far with three. - Kim Hollis, 10:10 pm (Meaning, the year Godfather won Best Picture it won only 3 Oscars while Cabaret won 8, including Director) Boring, I know - J. Don Birnam, 10:10 pm ALL THE TECHNICAL AWARDS!!! - David Mumpower, 10:11 pm There's going to be a special Emmy this year for "Best cleavage in the background of an awards show crowd shot". - Les Winan, 10:11 pm Ed: Fair point. - J. Don Birnam, 10:11 pm Best Supporting Actress is coming up. I really want to hear June Squibb. - J. Don Birnam, 10:12 pm Sandra Bullock is smiling and clapping because her Gravity contract gives her another 10% of the gross for every Oscar. - Les Winan, 10:12 pm This is easily the most competitive category. Could easily go to Lupita Nyong'o or Jennifer Lawrence. - Edwin Davies, 10:13 pm June Squibb would be the only winner named after a special effect. - Les Winan, 10:14 pm The clip they just showed of August: Osage County is all anybody needs to know about it to understand why its nominations are an abomination. - David Mumpower, 10:14 pm The Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress goes to Lupita Nyong'o. - Kim Hollis, 10:15 pm David, that looked like Yelling: The Movie. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:15 pm I could not be happier about that win. - Kelly Metz, 10:15 pm Lupita Nyong'o wins an Oscar the same day that her latest movie number one at the box office. All glory to Liam Neesons! - David Mumpower, 10:16 pm Kelly: Same here. Lupita is amazing. - J. Don Birnam, 10:16 pm Very, very pleased with that result. - Edwin Davies, 10:16 pm This is one of the classic acceptance speeches in all of Oscar history. - Max Braden, 10:17 pm Well that was an awesome speech from Lupita Nyong'o. - Les Winan, 10:17 pm That speech was wonderful. - Kelly Metz, 10:18 pm "Pure Imagination" is a lovely choice of music for Lupita to walk off the stage to. - Kim Hollis, 10:18 pm I'm just concerned about the army of the dead that Steve McQueen apparently commands now. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:19 pm With that speech, Lupita Nyong'o did not simply win an Academy Award. She won tonight's Academy Awards. Nobody is topping that. - David Mumpower, 10:20 pm Every woman in a nice dress is cringing in fear of that pizza right now. - Max Braden, 10:21 pm They are now delivering pizza at the Academy Awards. This pizza delivery guy is going to be THE leading story on social media tomorrow. - David Mumpower, 10:22 pm Eating pizza in a white tux is some Insanity Wolf level stuff. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:22 pm I really want some pizza now - J. Don Birnam, 10:22 pm "Of course you assume I want pizza." - Jonah Hill - Les Winan, 10:23 pm Ellen already broke Twitter, now all the pizza joints will break too. - J. Don Birnam, 10:23 pm "This person needs no introduction" is the "Webster's dictionary defines..." of award show cliches. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:24 pm Umm...is that a...thing? - J. Don Birnam, 10:25 pm "Here is our space penis." - Les Winan, 10:25 pm That design for the future museum looks like a Hungry Hungry Hippo piece. - Max Braden, 10:25 pm That museum is also capable of interstellar travel. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:25 pm I want Ellen Degeneres to host every year. I'm really enjoying this show. - Kelly Metz, 10:26 pm Why didn't Bill Murray and Harrison Ford present together in a "I don't give a shit" pairing? - Les Winan, 10:26 pm Murray: "You're the brains of the operation too, baby, tell 'em who's up for best shooter." - Max Braden, 10:27 pm After this, Bill Murray reads the winner and says "...and they'll never believe you!" - Edwin Davies, 10:27 pm HURRAY HAROLD RAMIS SHOUT OUT. - Les Winan, 10:27 pm Reagan, just once: "Our next presenter needs no introduction." *host walks off stage* - Tim Briody, 10:27 pm The Academy Award for Best Cinematography goes to Gravity. - Kim Hollis, 10:27 pm Emmanuel Lubezki wins Cinematography--an overdue win after Tree of Life and Children of Men. - J. Don Birnam, 10:28 pm Did...Bill Murray just say something nice about Harold Ramis? - Kelly Metz, 10:28 pm Everyone says they want to share this award with the cast and crew, but they're liars. *I* really want to share it. - Max Braden, 10:28 pm Bill Murray makes a late grab to win the Oscars with that Ramis shout out. - Edwin Davies, 10:29 pm Lubezki was a six time nominee, and he was as robbed for Children of Men as anybody has been in the 2000s. - David Mumpower, 10:29 pm That might be my favorite version of "Cups". - Kelly Metz, 10:30 pm With cinematography, does that mean that Director is in the bag for Gravity? - Edwin Davies, 10:30 pm The Academy Award for Best Editing goes to Gravity. - Kim Hollis, 10:30 pm Gravity is now 5 for 5. - David Mumpower, 10:31 pm This was one of the ones I thought 12 Years could take away from Gravity. The sweep might be in full effect. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:31 pm Best Film Editing win for Gravity. A tell-tale sign of what's to come later on tonight? - J. Don Birnam, 10:31 pm I still think 12 Years a Slave will win Picture, but Gravity is making that prospect dimmer and dimmer. - Edwin Davies, 10:32 pm Alfonso Cuaron doesn't need to speak now as he'll be back on stage shortly. - Les Winan, 10:32 pm I honestly thought Captain Phillips tension inducing moments would win it. There is definitely a full effect of technical sweep. Question now is: Will it go all the way? - J. Don Birnam, 10:32 pm Cuaron ceding the acceptance speech to his co-winner is either immensely classy, or a terrific display of confidence. Or both. - Edwin Davies, 10:32 pm Whoopi Goldberg thought she was going to an Old Country Buffet tonight. - Les Winan, 10:33 pm Whoopi angling for a role in Kinky Boots. - Max Braden, 10:34 pm P!nk is now performing. There is nothing else in my world for the next five minutes. - David Mumpower, 10:35 pm David: I have been struggling to keep the party silent for speeches all night. Pink just did it for me by showing up. - J. Don Birnam, 10:35 pm The musical performances are very strong in this year's broadcast. - Max Braden, 10:35 pm I wonder if they booked Pink originally to sing "Alone Yet Not Alone" and had to scramble for something else for her to do. - Edwin Davies, 10:36 pm I wonder if that pizza guy ever got his tip, because he's going to to be super late for his next delivery and you know they won't tip him. - Les Winan, 10:37 pm When P!nk inevitably wins an Academy Award, remember this moment. Because the votes definitely will. - David Mumpower, 10:38 pm Pink was chosen because, like Judy Garland, she knew how to get this party started. In Judy's case, the answer was "barbiturates." - Edwin Davies, 10:39 pm "When Pink inevitably wins an Academy Award" is up there with your "The Rock will be bigger than Tom Cruise" prediction. - Les Winan, 10:40 pm Here's that great group selfie Ellen took a short bit ago: https://twitter.com/TheEllenShow/status/440322224407314432/photo/1 - Max Braden, 10:40 pm So you're saying I'm about to go two for two, Les? - David Mumpower, 10:40 pm It was easy to predict that The Rock would be bigger than Tom Cruise. The guy's a mountain. He was probably bigger than him when he was 6. - Edwin Davies, 10:41 pm These Resurrection commercials are too creepy. - Les Winan, 10:42 pm It's too bad my niece's bedtime was too early for this Ellen princess outfit. - Max Braden, 10:43 pm A half hour ago I asked my husband if we'd ever see Ellen in a dress during this (or any) ceremony. Umm... - Kelly Metz, 10:43 pm This would be a great time for Benedict Cumberbatch to finally shed his exoskeleton and take his final form. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:44 pm The Academy Award for Best Production Design goes to The Great Gatsby. - Kim Hollis, 10:44 pm And down goes Gravity! - David Mumpower, 10:44 pm You know if they were to remake Deliverance, Cumberbatch would be at the top of my casting list for that dueling banjos kid. - Max Braden, 10:44 pm It's looking more and more likely that American Hustle will get completely shut out. I am more than fine with that. - Edwin Davies, 10:46 pm Cap! - Les Winan, 10:46 pm If Cuaron wins Director, he and Catherine Martin will be the two individuals to win more than one Oscar at the 2014 Academy Awards. Trivia for you! - J. Don Birnam, 10:46 pm These movie montages are cool, but I'm pretty sure you could just release them on YouTube and they'd get seen by more people without slowing the ceremony down. - Edwin Davies, 10:47 pm The Oscars are currently doing a tribute to heroes. When will they finally perform the long overdue tribute to elevators? - David Mumpower, 10:47 pm Why didn't they just use the entire Amazing Spider-Man training montage to that Coldplay song? - Les Winan, 10:47 pm Did they not show Shatner's Kirk in a hero montage that included Storm? - Max Braden, 10:48 pm I feel like Gillette should be throwing product into the Oscar gift bags. The beard trend has to be eating them alive. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:49 pm "Next up: a super cut of all the times Keanu Reeves said "Whoa!"" - Reagen Sulewski, 10:50 pm Les, I was going to say "which Coldplay song" but then I realized that's a ridiculous thing to say. - Reagen Sulewski, 10:54 pm If this "In Memoriam" segment doesn't include Kim Novak's original face I'm going to throw something across the room. - Les Winan, 10:55 pm Our yearly reminder that the world has a few less cool, interesting people in it than a year ago. - Edwin Davies, 10:56 pm Weird that of all Elmore Leonard's credits, they went for Joe Kidd. - Edwin Davies, 10:57 pm This year's In Memoriam section receives a musical accompaniment from Bette Midler, who is singing Wind Beneath My Wings. I won't lie. It's weird. - David Mumpower, 10:59 pm Bette Midler is going to milk the applause just a moment too long. - Les Winan, 11:02 pm Did they just cut Bette Midler off? - J. Don Birnam, 11:02 pm I feel like Bette thought that was all about her. - Reagen Sulewski, 11:02 pm "Is that Goldie Hawn? She looks like she's had...some stuff...done." - my wife - Les Winan, 11:05 pm It's like she learned nothing at all from Death Becomes Her! - Reagen Sulewski, 11:06 pm Someone just pointed out on Twitter that Dennis Farina was left off that montage. There's going to be some serious damage done in Tough Guy Heaven tonight. - Edwin Davies, 11:07 pm Goldie Hawn said "slave" the way normal people say "kitten." - Edwin Davies, 11:07 pm Oh, here we go... - Kelly Metz, 11:08 pm Whoops! Travolta forgot his glasses. - Kim Hollis, 11:09 pm Idina Menzel is no Demi Lovato. - Tony Kollath, 11:10 pm Other moment of complete silence tonight: Idina bringing down the house - J. Don Birnam, 11:10 pm John Travolta just announced that "Adele Dazeem" would perform Let It Go. I suspect Mr. Travolta needs contacts. - David Mumpower, 11:11 pm She looks terrified and is about a half a beat off. I'm really surprised given that she's a stage performer by trade. - Reagen Sulewski, 11:11 pm Lovato's version is better, dammit! - David Mumpower, 11:11 pm And now, the stars of Stealth, Jamie Foxx and Jessica Biel! - Kim Hollis, 11:12 pm Reagen: I just said the same thing. Something about that performance seemed...just slightly off. Surprising for a stage actress. - Kelly Metz, 11:13 pm Hey, look, it's the stars of Stealth! - Reagen Sulewski, 11:13 pm Demi Lovato, on the other hand, absolutely nailed her performance of Let It Go during the Disney Christmas Parade. I'm just sayin'. - David Mumpower, 11:14 pm Nice try, David. - Kelly Metz, 11:14 pm The Academy Award for Best Original Score goes to Steven Price for Gravity. - Kim Hollis, 11:14 pm John Williams to Steven Price, "No hard feelings. I've got 5." - Edwin Davies, 11:16 pm That was one I was quite hoping for. It's an innovative score and practically a character in the movie. - Reagen Sulewski, 11:16 pm The difference I am noticing between Gravity now and Titanic back then is that all of James Cameron's employees seemed terrified of him. Alfonso Cuarón's people all go out of their way to praise him. Cuarón strikes me as a better leader. - David Mumpower, 11:16 pm The Academy Award for Best Song goes to "Let It Go" from Frozen. - Kim Hollis, 11:16 pm Robert Lopez has his EGOT now. - Kelly Metz, 11:17 pm That's an EGOT! - Edwin Davies, 11:17 pm EGOT! - Les Winan, 11:17 pm The 12th person in history to win "EGOT" - J. Don Birnam, 11:17 pm Fun fact: the concept of the EGOT was invented by Phillip Michael Thomas. - Reagen Sulewski, 11:18 pm That speech was totally prepared as if they knew they were going to win. - Max Braden, 11:19 pm Okay, the husband/wife team behind Let It Go just became some of my favorite people on Earth. If you are not watching live, Google their acceptance speech. They are adorable together. - David Mumpower, 11:19 pm Hey Pharrell, are you still Happy? - David Mumpower, 11:22 pm Man, don't accuse Brad Pitt of being cheap. - Max Braden, 11:23 pm The Academy Award for Best Adapted Screenplay goes to John Ridley for 12 Years a Slave. - Kim Hollis, 11:25 pm I prefer to think of this as a make-good for Undercover Brother. - Reagen Sulewski, 11:25 pm Pitt had cash strapped to every part of his body. Does he make Angelina dance for singles or something? - David Mumpower, 11:25 pm 12 Years a Slave is well on its way to a Best Picture win, I would wager. - J. Don Birnam, 11:25 pm Are screenwriters allowed to look this classy? - Max Braden, 11:26 pm The Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay goes to Spike Jonze for Her. - Kim Hollis, 11:27 pm My iPhone has never been so happy! - Edwin Davies, 11:28 pm Blech. - Kelly Metz, 11:28 pm Jonze joins ex-wife Sofia Coppola as a winner for Screenplay. Imagine the stories they could have told if they had stayed together. - David Mumpower, 11:28 pm This'll take some of the sting away from Bad Grandpa's loss, but it can never truly take away the pain. - Edwin Davies, 11:29 pm And here to present the award is the director of Ghost Dad! - Edwin Davies, 11:34 pm The Academy Award for Best Director goes to Alfonso Cuarón for Gravity. - Kim Hollis, 11:34 pm They should dangle his Oscar just out of reach as he tries to grab for it. - Max Braden, 11:35 pm Gravity is now 7 for 8. It is unlikely to win for Best Actress with Sandra Bullock, meaning that Best Picture will determine whether it wins one more time tonight. - David Mumpower, 11:35 pm First Academy Award acceptance speech to include the word "sucks"? - Max Braden, 11:36 pm I am so happy for this win. - J. Don Birnam, 11:36 pm heh. "The wise guys at Warner Brothers, eh- the wise *people* at Warner Brothers..." - Max Braden, 11:37 pm As Cuarón delivers a wonderful acceptance speech, this is a wonderful time to mention that if you have not watched Children of Men yet, it is every bit as good as Gravity. - David Mumpower, 11:37 pm Second the Children of Men thought. And can I get a shout out for Prisoner of Azkhaban? No? - J. Don Birnam, 11:39 pm Well, this blows apart my theory that Meryl Streep is just Daniel Day-Lewis in character. - Edwin Davies, 11:42 pm I'd like to thank Daniel Day-Lewis for taking time out from becoming a blacksmith to present this. - Reagen Sulewski, 11:43 pm The Academy Award for Best Actress goes to Cate Blanchett for Blue Jasmine. - Kim Hollis, 11:44 pm Children of Men deserved more accolades than it got. - Kelly Metz, 11:44 pm "Five straight losses? I guess it's time to work with an accused pedophile." - Amy Adams - Les Winan, 11:44 pm You can get a shout out for Prisoner of Azkaban! It's my favorite Potter movie. (Actually, I love all his films. He's amazing.) - Kim Hollis, 11:44 pm Hesitant clapping for Woody Allen. - Max Braden, 11:46 pm Big shout out to Subjectivity there from Cate Blanchett. - Edwin Davies, 11:46 pm I think Jennifer Lawrence is about to go Joe Pesci on someone. - Edwin Davies, 11:49 pm Jennifer Lawrence don't give a f%$#. - Les Winan, 11:50 pm The Academy Award for Best Actor goes to Matthew McConaughey for Dallas Buyers Club. - Kim Hollis, 11:51 pm I have a distinct feeling the word "alright" is about to be the top trend on Twitter. - Tim Briody, 11:51 pm I like to pretend that every role Matthew McConaughey plays is just Wooderson later in life. - Les Winan, 11:51 pm John Grisham was (eventually) right! - Reagen Sulewski, 11:51 pm Boop! - Kim Hollis, 11:51 pm Most predictable Oscars ever, eh? - J. Don Birnam, 11:52 pm This was a really strong category, but they got the right guy. - Kelly Metz, 11:53 pm This episode of True Detective got weird. - Reagen Sulewski, 11:53 pm "My hero is me" - Les Winan, 11:54 pm Allright allright allright. I loved this speech. - Kelly Metz, 11:54 pm He's rambling, but stay with him: he's about to figure out that Leo is The Yellow King. - Edwin Davies, 11:55 pm Gravity is already the biggest winner since Slumdog Millionaire five years ago. It could tie that film with 8 victories if it wins Best Picture. It is currently tied with Shakespeare in Love as the third most successful film at the Oscars over the past 15 years. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King is the top performer with 11 victories although we retroactively remove one for each lousy Hobbit movie that gets released. - David Mumpower, 11:55 pm Final chance to change predictions guys! - J. Don Birnam, 11:55 pm Like a celebration on Endor, the bongos will drum loud and long tonight. - Max Braden, 11:55 pm "Now to present Best Picture, the year's Worst Actor!" - Reagen Sulewski, 11:55 pm "I WON A RAZZIE, PEOPLE!" - Will Smith - Les Winan, 11:55 pm On the other hand, if Gravity does not win, it will fall one Oscar short of Cabaret's record for most Oscars without Best Picture. Cabaret had 8. Slave would win 3 Oscars like Argo - J. Don Birnam, 11:56 pm The Academy Award for Best Picture goes to 12 Years a Slave. - Kim Hollis, 11:56 pm When Leonardo DiCaprio finally wins a Best Actor Oscar, do you think his speech will just list supermodels he's slept with? - Les Winan, 11:57 pm Brad Pitt wins his first Oscar! - Max Braden, 11:57 pm In successive years, Ben Affleck and Brad Pitt win producing Oscars. A time traveller from 1995 would be very confused right now. - Reagen Sulewski, 11:58 pm Brad Pitt has followed the Michael Douglas route to Oscar glory. - Edwin Davies, 11:59 pm Reagen, not to mention Oscars for Jordan Catalano and the stoner from Dazed and Confused. - Tim Briody, 11:59 pm Quick, audience, squeeze together for a group selfie! - Max Braden, 12:02 am If you used our staff predictions to fill out your Oscar ballot, you would have done quite well. Our staff winner was David Mumpower with 21 correct, followed by our Oscar columnist J Don Birnam. Well done, gentlemen! - Kim Hollis, 12:04 am Congrats to the winner of the ballot and good night! - J. Don Birnam, 12:06 am BOP's staff collectively predicted all 10 winners in the major categories (including Best Animated Feature and Best Foreign Language Film). Well done, everyone! - David Mumpower, 12:11 am Okay, that is a wrap for this year. Thanks for reading, everyone. Enjoy the endless onslaught of fashion critiques in the morning. - David Mumpower, 12:12 am
|
Print this column
|
|
|
Thursday, October 31, 2024
© 2024 Box Office Prophets, a division of One Of Us, Inc.