Trailer Hitch for August 14, 2003

By Zach Kolkin

Kula should have totally won Surf Girls.

10. Blackball

Ever thought to yourself, I wonder whether you could make an entire movie out of testicle jokes? I know I'll be able to sleep much better tonight knowing that the answer to this age old question is an emphatic yes thanks to this British comedy about -- wait for it -- lawn bowling. James Cromwell (whose presence can only be explained by one word- blackmail) and Vince Vaughn are the two biggest stars here, but I can't imagine that their presence would entice anyone to see what has to be one of the most ludicrous movies of the year (and I don't mean that in a good way). The promo is chock-full of ball jokes, and while it might be funny the first 85 times, after that it gets old really quickly. Sure, we all enjoy our fair share of bathroom humor, but like anything else, these jokes work best in moderation.

9. Passionada

Passionada appears to be a rather unoriginal romantic comedy about a man who (surprise, surprise) pretends to be someone he's not in order to get the object of his affection to fall in love with him. Sooner or later, though, the truth comes out, and yada yada yada, they have a falling out and eventually get back together and live happily ever after. Since the plot certainly isn't going to win anyone over, this film would benefit greatly from a good cast; unfortunately, Jason Isaacs is one of the least likely romantic comedy leads around. While a fine actor, Isaacs seems completely out of place in this flirtatious role. Oh, and if you needed any other clues that this isn't going to be too great of a film, look no further than the fact that Isaacs woos his paramour with dead fish. Because nothing says I love you like a rotting carp.

8. Timeline

I don't care how willing a suspension of disbelief you have, there's no way that Paul Walker makes a good erudite. Honestly, who decided to cast him as a historian who also understands the science behind time travel? In any case, Michael Crichton's recent book is being adapted to the screen, and although this trailer is marginally better than the original teaser, it still suffers from the distraction that is Walker playing a smart guy. On top of that, the story, which in the book was extremely intriguing, seems rather dull and flat here. It would seem that a lot has been lost in the transition from novel to screen, which is unfortunate, since the book was rather good. It will be interesting to see how this trailer plays to those who haven't read the book. Unfortuantely, I would imagine that the reaction will not be too enthusiastic.

7. Step into Liquid

Another August, another surfing movie. This time, however, the film is a documentary. While the trailer certainly features a ton of gorgeous shots, I was a little put off by the fact that there really wasn't any description of what the subject of the movie actually was. Sure, it's about surfers, but does it follow a specific tournament, or is it just an introduction to the sport, or is just a bunch of cool tricks in pretty locales all spliced together? The type of audience that one would normally associate with a surfing movie is a far cry from the type one would expect to see a documentary, and I think that, combined with the lack of explanation in the promo, could leave this movie without much of an audience.

6. The Missing

Tommy Lee Jones and Cate Blanchett play a father and daughter who come together after a long estrangement in order to save Blanchett's kidnapped daughter in this thriller from Ron Howard. The trailer is quite spooky, spending a lot more time setting up the film's atmosphere than its plotline. While it's nice not to have the entire movie ruined, the promo might be a little too cryptic for most, as the preview features an inordinate amount of creeping around in a dark forest. While this promo serves as a good teaser introducing the film to audiences, I think a more descriptive trailer would have an even greater effect on getting moviegoers interested in seeing this flick.

5. I Capture the Castle

This lighthearted romantic film tells the story of an English family who, despite their lack of wealth, live in an abandoned castle in a small town. One of the daughters meets a charming man who is himself quite well off, and they become engaged, much to the delight of the rest of her family. However, it turns out that she is not actually in love with the man, while her sister is. From there, one can most likely predict where the story will go; of course, the comfort of a predictable but delightful plotline like this one is sometimes exactly what moviegoers are looking for. The trailer certainly has charm to it, and this seems like a film that would appeal strongly to adults, if they get the opportunity to see the ad.

4. And Now Ladies & Gentlemen

Though the title is slightly off-putting, this sensual thriller tells the tale of a jewel thief and a singer who become entangled in an exotic adventure. The film stars Jeremy Irons and French music star Patricia Kaas in her debut picture. Obviously, this is a movie which will benefit from its cast much more on an international level than it will in the United States. Nevertheless, the promo is quite intriguing, and the story certainly looks to be a good one. We don't see too much of the chemistry between Kaas and Irons, but it is tough to expect too much from a first-time actress. Only time will tell, though, if Kaas manages to pull off a respectable performance, in what will probably make or break the film.

3. My Life Without Me

In what is certainly the most depressing premise of the week, Sarah Polley stars as a young mother who learns she only has a few months to live, and all that she tries to experience before she runs out of time. The trailer interestingly sets itself up as a list of all the things Polleys character wants to do before she dies, printing them out on screen and then showing the viewer how she attempts to do it. This actually works quite well, and it even takes away some of the intense sadness from the storyline. Such an emotional plot runs a fine line between being poignant and being a Lifetime Movie of the Week, but with a promising cast, including Polley, Mark Ruffalo, and Scott Speedman, this film looks like it has the potential to fall into the former category.

2. Dummy

Nothing like a little Jehovah's Witnesses humor to cap the very promising trailer to this lighthearted film starring everyone's favorite Oscar winner, Adrien Brody. Brody plays an aspiring ventriloquist whose confidence skyrockets in the presence of his wooden companion. He falls for his employment counselor, and from that premise we have a rather unique take on the romantic comedy. Brody's character here couldn't be more different than his title role in The Pianist, and I think many will be quite pleasantly surprised to see how smoothly he fits into a comedy such as this one. With this kind of versatility, Brody certainly seems to have quite a career ahead of him.

1. Cold Creek Manor

This spooky new thriller stars Sharon Stone and Dennis Quaid as a married couple that move their family to a beautiful old house in a small town in order to raise their kids in a more rustic setting. However, they soon discover that the house has a terrible past that begins to eerily affect them as well. The promo is quite good, effectively setting up the story, but not giving everything away (looking in your direction, What Lies Beneath). The film obviously hopes to capitalize on the success of other recent similar supernatural tales, and it looks like it does that without going so far as to seem a complete carbon copy. This is certainly a very effective trailer, especially for the film's genre, and I expect that the movie will get quite a bit of attention if it is given enough advertising exposure.

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