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But many of us do, taking to heart the fallacy that there's something wrong with you if you're not married by the time you're 30, or you're the only one of your friends who's single at 40. I think we'd all like to find true love, but not every woman is made out of ice cream and rainbows and even the ones who are probably wouldn't really be interested in a man who was. And speaking of men, where do romantic comedies usually leave us? Though I often sit through them to please someone else, there are plenty I could name that I know I have enjoyed immensely. Waitress, Sideways and High Fidelity come to mind, but even these are films that are engineered to appeal primarily to women or to men who already have women in their lives. Where are the films for single guys with high standards who don't want to be with someone just to be with someone? What if you're the type of guy who isn't necessarily a hopeless romantic but you'd like to meet a girl who's not interested in "settling"? What if you're interested in someone who'd rather not spend the rest of their life trapped in a mediocre relationship, waking up each morning next to someone they do love, but also know would be better off with someone else? If you're already married I would recommend something featuring John Cusack. If you have a PhD you might want to check out Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. But if you're still young and single, or just want to remember the good old days when you were, I'd recommend that you revisit Swingers.

Quietly released in 1996, Swingers is not the sort of film many people think of as obscure; after all I don't know anyone who takes a trip to Las Vegas without quoting one of several memorable lines from this movie, whether they've actually seen it or not. But in fact Swingers was the sort of film that very few people paid attention to until several years later, when positive word-of-mouth helped popularize it on video. If you're like me, your first exposure to it was on VHS, when you looked down at the box and were surprised to find that the film you just laughed yourself silly watching was three or four years old. Even today, what sticks with most people about the film is Vince Vaughn's oily, lounge lizard lady-killer. They remember a lot of male bonding but forget that at its heart, Swingers was a romantic comedy, sans the romance. This is because Swingers wasn't just any romantic comedy, it was one made almost exclusively for the amusement of young, single men – and that in and of itself makes it unusual.

The story centers on Mikey, a struggling East Coast comedian who's traveled to Los Angeles seeking fame and fortune. Having left behind a promising long term relationship to make the trip, Mike is having a tough time coming to terms with his choice, and with the brutal reality of show business. He belongs to a close knit circle of friends who all struggle with the same issues, but Mikey is the only one who can't seem to pull himself together and deal with defeat. Where his friends are mostly outgoing playboys, Mike is the sensitive, emotionally fragile type that seems ill suited for a life on stage. But his friends stand behind him and do their best to put "Little Mikey" in situations where he can meet women and be successful. Unfortunately, Mike spends his time mooning over his lost love, and brooding over his stalled career. He is uneasy with the ladies, constantly second guessing himself and tripping over his words every time he opens his mouth. In fact, some of the funniest parts of Swingers are the parts that aren't. Mikey's intimacy issues make for some of the most uncomfortable - and memorable scenes in the film. And conversley, his gang's madcap late night adventures provide some of the movie's most powerful and poignant moments.

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